Deep down everyone just wants to be happy. The problem is that no one really knows what will ultimately make them happy, until they try it.
I think one of the biggest problems in America these days is that every one thinks that THINGS will make them happy. In particular, the biggest, nicest and most expensive THINGS. From cars to houses to toys to clothes. Americans have this serious complex about being better than everyone else. But why on earth do they feel that way? Our grandparents certainly weren't raised that way. I don't think our parents were either. But somewhere between my parents' generation and mine something happened that caused this serious disconnect in American society. People began to value things more and more. The acquisition to get more things, better things, pushed out family and friends and values. The morals that our parents were raised on are slacking in my generation and they seem to be utterly lacking from teens today.
Some of the happiest people I know are people that spend very little time worrying about what kind of car they drive, or how much their shoes cost, or whether or not their neighbor's house is nicer. The happiest people I know don't live in big lavish mansions or drive the latest model of Beamer. They don't need to. They have their families, their friends, food on the table and clothes on their back. That's all they need.
So many people spend their whole lives trying to get something better instead of just enjoying what they have. People waste their lives. Then die miserable wondering where they went wrong.
Five years ago, when Josh and I bought our little three bedroom one bath home, we thought of it as our starter home. Most people would say that was all it is. We figured in 5 or 10 years we would buy a bigger, nicer house in a better, nicer neighborhood. Since then of course a lot of things have changed.
First, the economy really flattened out and the bottom fell out of the housing market. Second, Josh and I decided we wanted to have a kid...or three...while we were young. These two factors combined have had a pretty dramatic impact on our lives. And especially on our plans for the future. The economy affected both our jobs, the housing market changed the value of our house and of course having kids changes EVERYTHING.
I have spent quite a bit of time fretting over finances lately. With #3 on the way, I know our expenses are going to go up. I have already started buying a jumbo pack of diapers every month so that we can start adjusting to that addition. But there will be more. Clothes and wipes and more laundry and more electricity and more water. Babies are quite the costly add-on.
One of the things I have fretted over the most is our continuing ability to save money each month. I don't worry that we can't cut some "fat" from our budget here and there to make ends meet if things are more than I'm anticipating when the baby comes. I worry that we won't be able to continue saving money for all the stuff I want to save for. And the main item in that list is a down payment for a new house.
I had gotten it into my head that the clock was really ticking on us upgrading homes. For one, it's important to me that I am without a house payment by the time I am of a "retirement age." The sooner the better. That's a big ole chunk of my monthly income. So I need to be in the long-term house at a reasonable age so I'm not working full-time until I'm 75 just to pay off my house. Another reason that I feel like I need to upgrade houses soon is that we have two girls already and only one full-sized bathroom in the house. Once both girls are in school that's just not going to work. We already get into some hairy situations with Evie screaming to go potty and Josh is in the bathroom and I feel like my bladder is being trampled by a tiny person (wonder why?) and am about to wet my pants. It's not often, but just often enough to make me worry about what we'll do when there are two or three potty-trained little people in the house. Thirdly, I really liked the idea of there being a "play room" in the house that the kids can just go wild in and me not worry about keeping picked up. And I feel like when the kids get older, they should be able to each have their own room if they want it. So several reasons that I've been thinking about bigger would be better. I also hate my yard currently. And hate that so little of it is usable since so much of it is a hill. And at times it would be nice to be a little further from the neighbors.
So I've had all this rolling around in my head, worrying at me. On top of that, we've had some recent additional, unplanned expenses that have eaten into our savings account, which always makes me antsy. And of course the biggest hurtle to buying a bigger home is that you need more income. And that isn't really within my control. I suppose my husband or I could get a second job. But I feel like we already get practically no time together and of course another job would cut further into that. So I don't really see that as viable.
Then last week, I was talking to my mom about money and houses and other things. She was talking about how she is going to get her house paid off this year and then she'll be free of that monthly debt. Which, by the way, I am incredibly jealous of. And we were talking about so-and-so who lives in the same house he lived in when he got married and how they rarely upgrade vehicles and as a result have money to pretty much do what they want. Take vacations, go out of town, etc. And how the generations before us generally had their houses paid off quite early, because generally they spent their lives in the house the same house that they were in when they got married.
And I got to thinking.
What's really important in our lives? Does it really matter how many square feet my house has? Is it more important to me to have that big house or would I rather go on a big family vacation each year? Do I want to spend thirty more years slowly watching a mortgage disappear while I live paycheck to paycheck and worry about money? Do kids really need their own ginormous room they can retreat to, with a tv and a laptop and an iPod?
I love my kids. And I love my husband. And I love my job. I don't love it all the time every day, but all in all, I would like to do this until I retire. It may not be a big paycheck, but it's an important job. And I get to help people. And it is not boring! So I don't see a big bump in my paycheck in the future. And my husband is doing what he can to move on up the corporate ladder
I don't think it's ever killed anyone to have to wait a couple extra minutes to use the restroom. And I've never heard of anyone dying from having to share a room with their sister. We live in a good neighborhood, one with lots of other kids that are out in the evenings riding bikes and playing ball. We have good neighbors that help out and watch out for each other.
It was like an epiphany.
What if we stayed in our current house? What if we just stayed?
I began rolling the idea around and the more I've thought about it, the more I like it. Josh and I have come up with a plan to remodel the basement. Turn the main room in the basement into our master bedroom and the smallest room into a giant walk in closet. Then convert another room down there into a mudroom/laundry room. Then turn what is currently a laundry/half-bath into a full bath. Our basement isn't one of those dirty, dark, dank, stinky basements. I mean, right now, it's not finished, so it is still pretty basementy. But it's not bad.
It's a big project. And it certainly won't happen tomorrow. We've got a long list of things to do downstairs. Starting with cleaning out all the junk and moving most of the non-trash junk into our outside storage building. Which also needs cleaning out! I'm already driving my husband a little crazy wanting to get started on stuff.
And of course, remodeling isn't free, or cheap. So it will still be a matter of waiting for money. But I'm hoping we can start the biggest chunk of the renovation in the spring with our tax refund. Finish out the new closet area and get it ready. Finish the walls in the soon-to-be bedroom and get them painted. Replace the light fixtures. Rebuild the stairs to put in a landing and make them less steep. And put down some nice plush carpet. Then do some serious furniture rearranging!
But I am really excited about it. Especially since having such a big open room means that Josh and I can FINALLY have a king sized bed! And still have room to walk in our bedroom. New carpet and a comfy reading area.
Before I'm ready to start sleeping on a separate floor from my littles, I told my hubby that I would probably want to get an alarm system installed. So that sirens will go off if a door or window is opened upstairs. And the littlest little needs to be sleeping through the night. But after we move our bedroom, the kids can have a really large playroom upstairs. And I've already got ideas for reading nooks and built in shelves.
Then the following year's tax refund could do the mudroom and the bathroom. .
Beyond the new bedroom and renovations, there's actually something I'm more excited about. I have totally gotten this whole "beating the Joneses" mentality out of my head. And I think that is just wonderful. Plus, staying in our current home means that we will continue to have money to set aside. And since this is the LAST baby (I mean it this time!) we can start using that money for vacations and family trips. More time with my family is far more important than anything else.
I think if more people found ways to be happy with what they had instead of longing for what they haven't, the world would be a much, much different place. Quit worrying about what everyone else has and look and how much you've been blessed with. If we lived in a one bedroom shack in the woods and I still had my family, I think I would be a pretty lucky gal. We all just need to thankful for what really matters, and quit worrying about all this other junk.
Tuesday, September 4, 2012
Wednesday, August 22, 2012
The Most Terrifying 5 Minutes of My Life
It's amazing how dramatically your life can change in just a brief window of time.
A busy Saturday, that was to be spent doing to the 1400 things that needed to be done in preparation for Evie's birthday party, with a brief interlude of fishing with my mom because that's what Evie wanted to do for her birthday, That was what my Saturday was supposed to be. But it all changed very suddenly on Saturday night and I feel like my whole world may have shifted since.
When something bad happens to one of your kids, the amount of parental guilt you can feel is absolutely mind-boggling. Even when friends, family and medical professionals reassure you that you did nothing wrong and there was nothing you could have done to change the outcome. You can sit and replay and rethink and question and doubt for days. It'll eat you alive. And break your heart. All at once. Parental guilt, the "what if's" and "maybe should've's" of parenting, might be one of the hardest things.
Saturday was chaotic from the get-go. I had so much to try and get done for Evie's birthday party on Sunday. Both kids woke up early and cranky so they were whiny and hard to deal with. In addition to party stuff, I had the regular Saturday chores like laundry, to get finished up. Then after naps, we were planning on meeting my mom to take the girls fishing, because Evie told me that was what she wanted to do for her birthday.
When Elly woke up from her nap, she felt warm, but not feverish, just like she had slept under her blanket and was still warm. I had all of our stuff ready to go so that we could leave just as soon as Elly was awake and had had her snack. I had extra snacks and juice packed for us to have while fishing so that we could just have a late supper when we got back. Elly was a little whiny, but instead of sitting with her like I might usually do I was running around trying to get Evie to put her shoes on and put her toys away, so that was what I attributed Elly's attitude to. Elly ate her goldfish and drank her juice and we all loaded into the van and hit the road.
Driving to my mom's, I glanced back and Elly was just riding along and Evie, who insisted she didn't need a nap, was asleep. I was hoping to let Evie get a good half hour to an hour to improve her mood. When we got to my mom's I glanced back and saw that Evie was still asleep. Elly had been pretty quiet the whole ride and when I slid open her door, I saw that she had puked all over herself and her car seat and the back floor board.
My mom was on her front porch and I yelled that I needed some help and asked if she would come help me. I got Elly out of her seat and put her down in front of the car. My mom came up and I told her that Elly had been sick and asked if she would get her clothes off of her. Elly felt feverish warm. Like a low-grade fever. Not warm enough for me to even check her temperature. Not warm enough for me to even worry about it. Elly runs fevers when she's teething. Kids get stomach things all the time. They throw up once and then an hour later they're back to running around.
After we got everything cleaned up, Elly was still cranky and a little warm. We left her clothes off her and she was sitting around in a diaper. Evie was still asleep in the car, but both back doors were open and it was cool and comfy in the car. My mom and I sat at the picnic table passing Elly back and forth when she wanted to be held and letting her roam around the yard. She continued sipping on her juice. She still felt warm.
This is the hour that I play back in my head The hour that I worry at in my mind, pick at like a chipped nail or a loose tooth. The hour that bothers me. The hour between when Elly was sick and when she had the seizure. Because I wonder if somewhere in there I should have known that she was really sick. That something was really wrong. I never checked her temperature. I never gave her any Tylenol. I never worried about her being "sick."
After about half an hour, Evie woke up. She wanted to go swimming, since I felt like maybe Elly didn't feel up to going fishing. So, my mom and Evie changed into bathing suits and hopped into the pool. While they swam, Elly wanted to sit on my lap and she and I ended up looking through my phone's photo album and watching old videos. Elly doesn't always like to sit around on someone's lap, but she's much calmer and easier to entertain than Evie, so it's not uncommon for her. She continued to feel warm, but still not hot.
After Evie and Ma got done swimming, they came back to the porch, where Elly and I were, and Evie did a swim suit fashion show for us. Shortly afterward, Evie went inside to use the bathroom and was gone for a little too long so my mom went in to check on her. It was a little after 7 p.m.
Elly started fussing then. And scooted up on me so her head was over my shoulder. I guess she felt it coming. I asked her what was wrong and then I felt her arms and legs jerking. I pulled her away from me to look and her and her out were out of focus and it seemed like she couldn't hear me. I was completely confused for about a count of three. Then it just hit me. Elly had just had a seizure. I jumped up and went running into the house.
She was still out of it. My mom took a couple of times to understand what I was saying. Of course, I may have been a bit freaked out and difficult to understand. We got Elly and Evie both dressed and ready and headed outside. We were arranging who was going to put another car seat into my car, since Elly's was still damp from being washed out earlier. when Elly started seizing again.
I called work for an ambulance and sat down in the middle of the front yard with Elly.
I have talked dozens of parents through seizures before. It's a script that in my typical day I could probably read with my eyes closed. If you called 911 because your kid was having a seizure I could calm you down, dispatch you an ambulance and help you get through the experience without a moment's hesitation. But when my baby started having a seizure, I sat down in the yard and just tried not to cry.
I spend a very large part of my life dealing with other people's emergencies. From a choking to a cardiac arrest to baby momma drama, the severity of the emergency varies, but to the person on the other end of the line, it's still an emergency. I am trained to give emergency medical instructions over the phone and do so dozens of times a day. But nothing prepares you for when it's your emergency.
Elly's seizure lasted about 5 minutes. I definitely thought it was about 15 minutes. It took about 15 minutes for the paramedics to arrive. Luckily for me, one of my co-workers who happens to be an EMT, drove out to sit with us. Even after the seizure ended, it was nearly 10 minutes more before she started to actually wake up. It was so nerve-wracking to sit there holding her tiny limp body, watching her breathe, while I waited for her to come to.
By the time the medics arrived, Elly was awake and starting to come to. They took her temperature and it was 102.7. We all felt pretty confident that it might have been a febrile seizure. So, we decided to take Elly to the hospital. Nearly 7 hours later, Elly was released from the hospital. She had received 2 uber doses of Motrin and was sent home with another large dose of Ibuprofen. She'd had chest X-rays, blood tests, a catheter urine test, an IV run and had spent most of a night at the hospital. But they weren't able to find anything wrong with her other than the fever.
Needless to say, it was a bad night.
The next day, I just wanted to sit and hold her, all day. Since the experience, I have had a hard time denying her something she asks for or fussing at her for something. My hubby fusses at me for not fussing at her. And for all the excess coddling she's gotten for the last few days. But this whole experience has made me really, really more appreciative of the two (almost three) wonderful kids I have. And I want to spend as much time as possible with them. I don't want to spend my time yelling at them for dumb stuff. Who cares if they get sticky fingers on the furniture, it'll wash. That's why we got leather furniture. Who cares if they dump all their blocks out in the floor, they're good kids, they'll at least HELP pick them up. If they want to drag every toy out of their toy box so they can climb into the toy box to have a tea party, that's fine. There's no point in sweating the small stuff, because when they're grown up, my kids won't really remember if there were finger prints on my tv or if the floors were occasionally sticky. They'll remember the times we spent together.
This doesn't mean I'm going all lax on my housekeeping and my home is going to become an unsanitary pig sty. Just that I'm going to make sure that I'm letting my kids be kids. And that I'm right there with them, playing and laughing.
I'm going to be a little slower to frustration and quicker to praise. When I think back on the day prior to Elly's seizure, so much of my time that day was spent griping at the girls for making messes, for fighting, for needing attention when I had other things to get done, etc. I was stressed trying to get everything done so I was quick to snap when they got into something. I even had a hormonal break down over the mess they made at lunch. I don't want to ever look back from a scary moment like that one with Elly and feel so much regret over a wasted day.
I hope that maybe some good will come from this. Something other than a new paranoia over fevers. I feel like this has had a pretty tremendous impact on me as a parent. Hopefully, Elly will never have another seizure. The doctor said many children outgrow them without having a second. But reassured us that febrile seizures do not affect IQ or development. They don't do any damage. They are mostly just terrifying. Either way, I hope that this is the only such "growing" experience that I have to go through like this.
A busy Saturday, that was to be spent doing to the 1400 things that needed to be done in preparation for Evie's birthday party, with a brief interlude of fishing with my mom because that's what Evie wanted to do for her birthday, That was what my Saturday was supposed to be. But it all changed very suddenly on Saturday night and I feel like my whole world may have shifted since.
When something bad happens to one of your kids, the amount of parental guilt you can feel is absolutely mind-boggling. Even when friends, family and medical professionals reassure you that you did nothing wrong and there was nothing you could have done to change the outcome. You can sit and replay and rethink and question and doubt for days. It'll eat you alive. And break your heart. All at once. Parental guilt, the "what if's" and "maybe should've's" of parenting, might be one of the hardest things.
Saturday was chaotic from the get-go. I had so much to try and get done for Evie's birthday party on Sunday. Both kids woke up early and cranky so they were whiny and hard to deal with. In addition to party stuff, I had the regular Saturday chores like laundry, to get finished up. Then after naps, we were planning on meeting my mom to take the girls fishing, because Evie told me that was what she wanted to do for her birthday.
When Elly woke up from her nap, she felt warm, but not feverish, just like she had slept under her blanket and was still warm. I had all of our stuff ready to go so that we could leave just as soon as Elly was awake and had had her snack. I had extra snacks and juice packed for us to have while fishing so that we could just have a late supper when we got back. Elly was a little whiny, but instead of sitting with her like I might usually do I was running around trying to get Evie to put her shoes on and put her toys away, so that was what I attributed Elly's attitude to. Elly ate her goldfish and drank her juice and we all loaded into the van and hit the road.
Driving to my mom's, I glanced back and Elly was just riding along and Evie, who insisted she didn't need a nap, was asleep. I was hoping to let Evie get a good half hour to an hour to improve her mood. When we got to my mom's I glanced back and saw that Evie was still asleep. Elly had been pretty quiet the whole ride and when I slid open her door, I saw that she had puked all over herself and her car seat and the back floor board.
My mom was on her front porch and I yelled that I needed some help and asked if she would come help me. I got Elly out of her seat and put her down in front of the car. My mom came up and I told her that Elly had been sick and asked if she would get her clothes off of her. Elly felt feverish warm. Like a low-grade fever. Not warm enough for me to even check her temperature. Not warm enough for me to even worry about it. Elly runs fevers when she's teething. Kids get stomach things all the time. They throw up once and then an hour later they're back to running around.
After we got everything cleaned up, Elly was still cranky and a little warm. We left her clothes off her and she was sitting around in a diaper. Evie was still asleep in the car, but both back doors were open and it was cool and comfy in the car. My mom and I sat at the picnic table passing Elly back and forth when she wanted to be held and letting her roam around the yard. She continued sipping on her juice. She still felt warm.
This is the hour that I play back in my head The hour that I worry at in my mind, pick at like a chipped nail or a loose tooth. The hour that bothers me. The hour between when Elly was sick and when she had the seizure. Because I wonder if somewhere in there I should have known that she was really sick. That something was really wrong. I never checked her temperature. I never gave her any Tylenol. I never worried about her being "sick."
After about half an hour, Evie woke up. She wanted to go swimming, since I felt like maybe Elly didn't feel up to going fishing. So, my mom and Evie changed into bathing suits and hopped into the pool. While they swam, Elly wanted to sit on my lap and she and I ended up looking through my phone's photo album and watching old videos. Elly doesn't always like to sit around on someone's lap, but she's much calmer and easier to entertain than Evie, so it's not uncommon for her. She continued to feel warm, but still not hot.
After Evie and Ma got done swimming, they came back to the porch, where Elly and I were, and Evie did a swim suit fashion show for us. Shortly afterward, Evie went inside to use the bathroom and was gone for a little too long so my mom went in to check on her. It was a little after 7 p.m.
Elly started fussing then. And scooted up on me so her head was over my shoulder. I guess she felt it coming. I asked her what was wrong and then I felt her arms and legs jerking. I pulled her away from me to look and her and her out were out of focus and it seemed like she couldn't hear me. I was completely confused for about a count of three. Then it just hit me. Elly had just had a seizure. I jumped up and went running into the house.
She was still out of it. My mom took a couple of times to understand what I was saying. Of course, I may have been a bit freaked out and difficult to understand. We got Elly and Evie both dressed and ready and headed outside. We were arranging who was going to put another car seat into my car, since Elly's was still damp from being washed out earlier. when Elly started seizing again.
I called work for an ambulance and sat down in the middle of the front yard with Elly.
I have talked dozens of parents through seizures before. It's a script that in my typical day I could probably read with my eyes closed. If you called 911 because your kid was having a seizure I could calm you down, dispatch you an ambulance and help you get through the experience without a moment's hesitation. But when my baby started having a seizure, I sat down in the yard and just tried not to cry.
I spend a very large part of my life dealing with other people's emergencies. From a choking to a cardiac arrest to baby momma drama, the severity of the emergency varies, but to the person on the other end of the line, it's still an emergency. I am trained to give emergency medical instructions over the phone and do so dozens of times a day. But nothing prepares you for when it's your emergency.
Elly's seizure lasted about 5 minutes. I definitely thought it was about 15 minutes. It took about 15 minutes for the paramedics to arrive. Luckily for me, one of my co-workers who happens to be an EMT, drove out to sit with us. Even after the seizure ended, it was nearly 10 minutes more before she started to actually wake up. It was so nerve-wracking to sit there holding her tiny limp body, watching her breathe, while I waited for her to come to.
By the time the medics arrived, Elly was awake and starting to come to. They took her temperature and it was 102.7. We all felt pretty confident that it might have been a febrile seizure. So, we decided to take Elly to the hospital. Nearly 7 hours later, Elly was released from the hospital. She had received 2 uber doses of Motrin and was sent home with another large dose of Ibuprofen. She'd had chest X-rays, blood tests, a catheter urine test, an IV run and had spent most of a night at the hospital. But they weren't able to find anything wrong with her other than the fever.
Needless to say, it was a bad night.
The next day, I just wanted to sit and hold her, all day. Since the experience, I have had a hard time denying her something she asks for or fussing at her for something. My hubby fusses at me for not fussing at her. And for all the excess coddling she's gotten for the last few days. But this whole experience has made me really, really more appreciative of the two (almost three) wonderful kids I have. And I want to spend as much time as possible with them. I don't want to spend my time yelling at them for dumb stuff. Who cares if they get sticky fingers on the furniture, it'll wash. That's why we got leather furniture. Who cares if they dump all their blocks out in the floor, they're good kids, they'll at least HELP pick them up. If they want to drag every toy out of their toy box so they can climb into the toy box to have a tea party, that's fine. There's no point in sweating the small stuff, because when they're grown up, my kids won't really remember if there were finger prints on my tv or if the floors were occasionally sticky. They'll remember the times we spent together.
This doesn't mean I'm going all lax on my housekeeping and my home is going to become an unsanitary pig sty. Just that I'm going to make sure that I'm letting my kids be kids. And that I'm right there with them, playing and laughing.
I'm going to be a little slower to frustration and quicker to praise. When I think back on the day prior to Elly's seizure, so much of my time that day was spent griping at the girls for making messes, for fighting, for needing attention when I had other things to get done, etc. I was stressed trying to get everything done so I was quick to snap when they got into something. I even had a hormonal break down over the mess they made at lunch. I don't want to ever look back from a scary moment like that one with Elly and feel so much regret over a wasted day.
I hope that maybe some good will come from this. Something other than a new paranoia over fevers. I feel like this has had a pretty tremendous impact on me as a parent. Hopefully, Elly will never have another seizure. The doctor said many children outgrow them without having a second. But reassured us that febrile seizures do not affect IQ or development. They don't do any damage. They are mostly just terrifying. Either way, I hope that this is the only such "growing" experience that I have to go through like this.
Thursday, August 16, 2012
The ASTOUNDING differences
Okay...so astounding might be a bit overstated. Maybe just the most obvious differences. This pregnancy isn't even halfway over and already the differences are pretty impressive.
I hope this doesn't become a whiny post. I really, really don't mean it as whining. Even in the most uncomfortable, I'm ready to have this baby NOW moments, I am ever grateful and appreciative of the miracle of life. I hate hearing those pregnant girls that just bitch and moan about the woes of pregnancy. There are times that being pregnant kinda sucks. I admit that. But please don't use being pregnant as your "Whine about everything" for free card. Of course, I am a little envious of those women who LOVE being pregnant and have no problems. But I try really hard not be one of those whiny ones. Even when I really want to whine!
Of course, every pregnancy is different. I know that. I learned that quite quickly in my second pregnancy. However, looking back, I can see the many similarities between the two pregnancies that this one doesn't have. Maybe I just didn't realize how similar they were until I experienced a TRULY different pregnancy.
One big difference has been the sickness. The only thing I can safely eat for breakfast is Multigrain Cheerios. Greasy stuff is a no-no. Overly sweet stuff is too. No fried bologna. No pancakes. No doughnuts. At least not on an empty stomach. If I eat something else first, then slightly greasy or a little sweet is manageable. Usually, I just stick with my cheerios.
For the first 9 weeks, I wasn't too sick in the mornings, but I got nauseous every afternoon around 2 p.m. and it would last a couple of hours. Then it disappeared. I got my energy back. Felt great. So good, that I called my doctor's office, embarrassed but concerned. Was it okay that I felt better already? The nurse assured me that it was.
Two weeks later however, that sickness came back with a vengeance. I spent an entire 24 hour period unable to keep food or water down. It sucked. It took nearly a week to learn to manage the sickness, between eating only certain foods and avoiding an empty stomach, focusing on protein and sucking on Preggie Pop Drops when I felt woozy. I still suffer from the nausea if I don't watch myself. If I get too hungry or eat the wrong stuff. But I haven't actually thrown up in about 2 weeks now. So, the Preggie Pop Drops are working.
I don't know if this sickness is going to go away or not. Hopefully once the baby is born I can get back to normal at least. But for now I'm 14.5 weeks pregnant and still suffering from "morning" sickness.
Another difference has been my skin. With the previous pregnancies, I had a pretty major breakout the first couple of weeks after finding out I was pregnant. Weeks 4-6 or 8, I was back in my teenage years when I looked in the mirror. But then it went away! And for the next 6 months or so, I had glowing, healthy pregnancy skin! Also, my typical skin problems, like my eczema and dry skin, were nonexistent during my pregnancies. My hair was luxurious and stopped shedding. It was so healthy and pretty the whole pregnancy!
This time, my skin has continued to be awful. And my hair is so dry and brittle! I have had to return to the acne aisle and reinvest in face washes and scrubs that I used in adolescence. I've had to stop using previous lotions because they were just making the situation worse. With new lotions and washes, I have got it somewhat under control. But my face is definitely not the same as it was 6 months ago. And I don't know what to do for my hair. Just, trying to get through it I guess.
I've also been suffering from constant congestion this time around. My nose always feels a bit stuffy. I know allergies have already started up, and I have been dealing with those some as well. Last week, the allergy drainage turned into a sinus infection which then lead to a chest cold/cough. FUN! But even without the allergies, I have this continuous stuffy-headed feeling. It's a bit weird. I feel okay most of the time, and if I blow my nose nothing happens, but I just feel congested.
This time there has also been insomnia. For the first couple of months, I couldn't keep my eyes open past lunch time it seemed. By the time I got the girls home and in the bed, I was out. But now, I will lie awake until 2 or 3 a.m. and then wake up exhausted at 7 a.m. unless I take something. I tried exercising early in the day. Staying active to burn enough energy to be tired. Tried chamomile tea. Tried various sleep situations. The problem wasn't being tired. I was exhausted! Was all I could do to get the girls to bed and get myself ready for bed. The moment I climbed under the sheets however, I was WIDE awake. I spoke with my OB and she seemed pretty comfortable with me taking a Benadryl at night to help me sleep. Of course, I have such a wussy tolerance for meds, I can't take a full dose of Benadryl. I can't even take half a dose! I take a quarter dose, or half a Benadryl, to help me sleep. That way I'm able to sleep about 8 hours at night.
So far, weight gain has been slow but steady, which is a nice difference. I look slightly pregnant in maternity stuff, but if I wear something baggy, I mostly look a lil chubby in the middle. The baby has continued to measure about a week ahead and I'm anxious for him/her to get to those big kicks and flips and twists. Despite the many challenges, I feel good. Only 4 more weeks until the BIG ultrasound. It will be so nice to be at the halfway point in the pregnancy, know the baby's gender and see that everything is okay with the baby.
Everyone says that with all the differences in the this pregnancy, it just HAS to be a boy! But we shall see!
I hope this doesn't become a whiny post. I really, really don't mean it as whining. Even in the most uncomfortable, I'm ready to have this baby NOW moments, I am ever grateful and appreciative of the miracle of life. I hate hearing those pregnant girls that just bitch and moan about the woes of pregnancy. There are times that being pregnant kinda sucks. I admit that. But please don't use being pregnant as your "Whine about everything" for free card. Of course, I am a little envious of those women who LOVE being pregnant and have no problems. But I try really hard not be one of those whiny ones. Even when I really want to whine!
Of course, every pregnancy is different. I know that. I learned that quite quickly in my second pregnancy. However, looking back, I can see the many similarities between the two pregnancies that this one doesn't have. Maybe I just didn't realize how similar they were until I experienced a TRULY different pregnancy.
One big difference has been the sickness. The only thing I can safely eat for breakfast is Multigrain Cheerios. Greasy stuff is a no-no. Overly sweet stuff is too. No fried bologna. No pancakes. No doughnuts. At least not on an empty stomach. If I eat something else first, then slightly greasy or a little sweet is manageable. Usually, I just stick with my cheerios.
For the first 9 weeks, I wasn't too sick in the mornings, but I got nauseous every afternoon around 2 p.m. and it would last a couple of hours. Then it disappeared. I got my energy back. Felt great. So good, that I called my doctor's office, embarrassed but concerned. Was it okay that I felt better already? The nurse assured me that it was.
Two weeks later however, that sickness came back with a vengeance. I spent an entire 24 hour period unable to keep food or water down. It sucked. It took nearly a week to learn to manage the sickness, between eating only certain foods and avoiding an empty stomach, focusing on protein and sucking on Preggie Pop Drops when I felt woozy. I still suffer from the nausea if I don't watch myself. If I get too hungry or eat the wrong stuff. But I haven't actually thrown up in about 2 weeks now. So, the Preggie Pop Drops are working.
I don't know if this sickness is going to go away or not. Hopefully once the baby is born I can get back to normal at least. But for now I'm 14.5 weeks pregnant and still suffering from "morning" sickness.
Another difference has been my skin. With the previous pregnancies, I had a pretty major breakout the first couple of weeks after finding out I was pregnant. Weeks 4-6 or 8, I was back in my teenage years when I looked in the mirror. But then it went away! And for the next 6 months or so, I had glowing, healthy pregnancy skin! Also, my typical skin problems, like my eczema and dry skin, were nonexistent during my pregnancies. My hair was luxurious and stopped shedding. It was so healthy and pretty the whole pregnancy!
This time, my skin has continued to be awful. And my hair is so dry and brittle! I have had to return to the acne aisle and reinvest in face washes and scrubs that I used in adolescence. I've had to stop using previous lotions because they were just making the situation worse. With new lotions and washes, I have got it somewhat under control. But my face is definitely not the same as it was 6 months ago. And I don't know what to do for my hair. Just, trying to get through it I guess.
I've also been suffering from constant congestion this time around. My nose always feels a bit stuffy. I know allergies have already started up, and I have been dealing with those some as well. Last week, the allergy drainage turned into a sinus infection which then lead to a chest cold/cough. FUN! But even without the allergies, I have this continuous stuffy-headed feeling. It's a bit weird. I feel okay most of the time, and if I blow my nose nothing happens, but I just feel congested.
This time there has also been insomnia. For the first couple of months, I couldn't keep my eyes open past lunch time it seemed. By the time I got the girls home and in the bed, I was out. But now, I will lie awake until 2 or 3 a.m. and then wake up exhausted at 7 a.m. unless I take something. I tried exercising early in the day. Staying active to burn enough energy to be tired. Tried chamomile tea. Tried various sleep situations. The problem wasn't being tired. I was exhausted! Was all I could do to get the girls to bed and get myself ready for bed. The moment I climbed under the sheets however, I was WIDE awake. I spoke with my OB and she seemed pretty comfortable with me taking a Benadryl at night to help me sleep. Of course, I have such a wussy tolerance for meds, I can't take a full dose of Benadryl. I can't even take half a dose! I take a quarter dose, or half a Benadryl, to help me sleep. That way I'm able to sleep about 8 hours at night.
So far, weight gain has been slow but steady, which is a nice difference. I look slightly pregnant in maternity stuff, but if I wear something baggy, I mostly look a lil chubby in the middle. The baby has continued to measure about a week ahead and I'm anxious for him/her to get to those big kicks and flips and twists. Despite the many challenges, I feel good. Only 4 more weeks until the BIG ultrasound. It will be so nice to be at the halfway point in the pregnancy, know the baby's gender and see that everything is okay with the baby.
Everyone says that with all the differences in the this pregnancy, it just HAS to be a boy! But we shall see!
Thursday, July 26, 2012
Hello Baby Bump...
The first time you are pregnant, you can't wait to start showing. The first few months of waiting for your belly to pooch out are cruel. You cannot wait for that belly so that everyone that sees you knows that you're pregnant.
Subsequent pregnancies, you don't have to wait. Or at least I haven't had to. When the hormones hit my abdominal muscles they know JUST what to do. And they do it. And then this little momma is wearing maternity pants at the beginning of the second trimester. It has been interesting to watch my body change with each pregnancy. The differences, the similarities. Each baby grows its own way and makes my body its home.
The most interesting difference this time hasn't been when I show. I actually waited longer this time to start showing than I did with Elly. I was already pretty big at Evie's first birthday, and unless something crazy happens in the next couple of weeks, that won't be the case this time. I hope that means I won't be as humongous as I was with Elly. But I doubt I will be so lucky! The interesting part has been the fact that I'm already measuring ahead...and that doesn't typically happen until the second trimester. I've had a bigger belly in previous pregnancies. But the part the doc measures is the uterus height. Not the fat, bloating, constipation, etc. that causes extra belly. But just the uterus. And I know I've got belly from the icky stuff. But this time I've been able to really feel and even SEE my uterus grow.
At my last appointment, the doc said I was measuring one month ahead. One month! So I'm very anxious for my next ultrasound, and seeing if this extra growth is all uterus or all baby. On one hand I'm hoping its baby...since that's the healthiest way to grow. But at the same time, I don't want to have a 12 pounder!
Maybe by the ultrasound it will all have balanced out. Who knows
I do like having the lil baby bump. The next four or five months are the really enjoyable ones of pregnancy. Most of the woes and worries of the first trimester are behind me. I have more energy and look pregnant, but am not so pregnant that I'm miserable.
And sometime in the next few weeks I will probably be feeling baby move! I felt Elly at 14 weeks and Evie at 16. Depending on where the placenta is and all of course. I have felt some small flutters in the last week. I know a doctor will probably tell me it is just gas bubbles or whatever...but I can tell the difference. And its only been when I am sitting in such a way that my tummy is kinda cramped. I am looking forward to the real kicks and flips and hiccups. That is one of my favorite parts of pregnancy!
Subsequent pregnancies, you don't have to wait. Or at least I haven't had to. When the hormones hit my abdominal muscles they know JUST what to do. And they do it. And then this little momma is wearing maternity pants at the beginning of the second trimester. It has been interesting to watch my body change with each pregnancy. The differences, the similarities. Each baby grows its own way and makes my body its home.
The most interesting difference this time hasn't been when I show. I actually waited longer this time to start showing than I did with Elly. I was already pretty big at Evie's first birthday, and unless something crazy happens in the next couple of weeks, that won't be the case this time. I hope that means I won't be as humongous as I was with Elly. But I doubt I will be so lucky! The interesting part has been the fact that I'm already measuring ahead...and that doesn't typically happen until the second trimester. I've had a bigger belly in previous pregnancies. But the part the doc measures is the uterus height. Not the fat, bloating, constipation, etc. that causes extra belly. But just the uterus. And I know I've got belly from the icky stuff. But this time I've been able to really feel and even SEE my uterus grow.
At my last appointment, the doc said I was measuring one month ahead. One month! So I'm very anxious for my next ultrasound, and seeing if this extra growth is all uterus or all baby. On one hand I'm hoping its baby...since that's the healthiest way to grow. But at the same time, I don't want to have a 12 pounder!
Maybe by the ultrasound it will all have balanced out. Who knows
I do like having the lil baby bump. The next four or five months are the really enjoyable ones of pregnancy. Most of the woes and worries of the first trimester are behind me. I have more energy and look pregnant, but am not so pregnant that I'm miserable.
And sometime in the next few weeks I will probably be feeling baby move! I felt Elly at 14 weeks and Evie at 16. Depending on where the placenta is and all of course. I have felt some small flutters in the last week. I know a doctor will probably tell me it is just gas bubbles or whatever...but I can tell the difference. And its only been when I am sitting in such a way that my tummy is kinda cramped. I am looking forward to the real kicks and flips and hiccups. That is one of my favorite parts of pregnancy!
Goodbye First Trimester
Well, if the speedy passing of the first trimester is any indication of how quickly the rest of the pregnancy is going to go, I better start doing more blogging or I won't remember any of it!
I cannot believe I am already finishing up my first trimester of my third pregnancy. It has been a very busy few years and I wouldn't change any of it, honestly. I am so glad that my third child is going to be close in age to the first two (but not quite as close as them! haha). Elly will be nearly two when #3 comes along and Evie will be 3.5.
I have done the math and redone the math and I'm pretty sure I will have nearly 3 months of time off accrued to enjoy with the new baby. Plus some QT with my older two! And that should be a sufficient time to get the littlest one on schedule with the others. Hopefully. Of course I will only have that much time if I manage to not take any more time off in the next 6 months. Which, after my bout yesterday with a stomach bug (or something), may be more challenging than anticipated.
I might just be more excited about this pregnancy and baby than the other two. I hope that doesn't sound bad. But unlike my previous pregnancies, I really feel like I know what to expect all around this time. Not that I don't know there could be a monkey wrench thrown in any day. I know things can change. With Evie, it was my first time for all of it. I didn't know what to expect from pregnancy, labor, birth or a new baby. No clue. And despite all my reading and preparing I still couldn't have been truly ready for parenthood. With Elly, I expected everything to go like my first pregnancy, which it didn't. And I expected labor and delivery to be way faster, which it wasn't. And I expected things to be pretty simple when we brought her home, which couldn't have been further from the truth. I thought that since I had done the newborn thing once, it would be easy to do again. I didn't realize how much harder it would be with another child. Or how much more difficult things would be with the first child when we added a second baby to the equation.
Pregnancy is made some what easier by having two other children to take care of. Well, not easier I guess. But certainly speedier. There is no time to sit around and moon over being pregnant and pine over how much longer until the baby comes. Those 4 weeks between appointments that dragged by with the first pregnancy are gone in a flash this time around. I have jokingly wondered if I could push the appointments to maybe every 6 weeks because I just don't have time to go to the doctor every month! I dunno how I will manage twice a month and weekly appointments towards the end. And there isn't time to sit around and be sore or lie around with my feet up. There is far too much to do between girls, work and the house.
And this time, I feel like even though this pregnancy is way different than the previous two, I'm a bit more prepared for it this time. The second time every little thing made me worry because I hadn't dealt with it when I was pregnant the first time. Now it's "Eh, feels like stretching pains," or "Back pain from overdoing it," or "Cramps from not peeing often enough." I've been through pretty much all the normal stuff at this point, most of it twice, so I feel like I can trust my judgment on when I should worry and when to call the doctor. Maybe that just comes from being a more experienced mom at this point. It kinda helps prepare for a lot of different things.
I know that bringing home a new baby will be incredibly challenging. And I am going to try breastfeeding this time. So that's going to add a whole new level to the challenge. Last time I may have been overly optimistic. I wasn't prepared for how exhausted I was going to be or how difficult Evie would become. And nothing could have prepared me for the trial of having Elly hospitalized at 10 days old.
But I am excited and hopeful. The next 6 months are going to be busy, even without the pregnancy. With the pregnancy, it's going to be a bit wild. Elly's third and final procedure is next Friday. I have another doctor's appointment, including an ultrasound (YAY!) the next week. Evie's THIRD birthday is just a couple weeks after, with her third birthday party, which will be fun but a busy couple of days. Then September is my birthday, my nephew's second birthday and the big 20 week ultrasound. I will be finishing up Christmas shopping, picking out Halloween costumes, switching out summer wardrobe for winter, and finally getting to buy stuff for the new baby in October. Then there will be Halloween, decorating for fall, followed by Thanksgiving. I will, of course, be working on Turkey Day. But I'm hoping that my family will be able to get together that weekend for a big celebratory meal at my house. Hopefully my husband will let me decorate for Christmas the week of Thanksgiving again this year. I liked having the tree up and the house all pretty when family came last year. I would like to do that again. Then it will be my absolute favorite time of the year, CHRISTMAS! Sugar cookies, and gingerbread houses and lights and maybe a little snow. Christmas is going to be even more fun this year with Evie and Elly. And then once Christmas is over and the tree is packed back up and all the lights are put away...I will have between 4-6 weeks to get ready for a baby.
So see, it's really going to be a pretty busy rest of the year!
I cannot believe I am already finishing up my first trimester of my third pregnancy. It has been a very busy few years and I wouldn't change any of it, honestly. I am so glad that my third child is going to be close in age to the first two (but not quite as close as them! haha). Elly will be nearly two when #3 comes along and Evie will be 3.5.
I have done the math and redone the math and I'm pretty sure I will have nearly 3 months of time off accrued to enjoy with the new baby. Plus some QT with my older two! And that should be a sufficient time to get the littlest one on schedule with the others. Hopefully. Of course I will only have that much time if I manage to not take any more time off in the next 6 months. Which, after my bout yesterday with a stomach bug (or something), may be more challenging than anticipated.
I might just be more excited about this pregnancy and baby than the other two. I hope that doesn't sound bad. But unlike my previous pregnancies, I really feel like I know what to expect all around this time. Not that I don't know there could be a monkey wrench thrown in any day. I know things can change. With Evie, it was my first time for all of it. I didn't know what to expect from pregnancy, labor, birth or a new baby. No clue. And despite all my reading and preparing I still couldn't have been truly ready for parenthood. With Elly, I expected everything to go like my first pregnancy, which it didn't. And I expected labor and delivery to be way faster, which it wasn't. And I expected things to be pretty simple when we brought her home, which couldn't have been further from the truth. I thought that since I had done the newborn thing once, it would be easy to do again. I didn't realize how much harder it would be with another child. Or how much more difficult things would be with the first child when we added a second baby to the equation.
Pregnancy is made some what easier by having two other children to take care of. Well, not easier I guess. But certainly speedier. There is no time to sit around and moon over being pregnant and pine over how much longer until the baby comes. Those 4 weeks between appointments that dragged by with the first pregnancy are gone in a flash this time around. I have jokingly wondered if I could push the appointments to maybe every 6 weeks because I just don't have time to go to the doctor every month! I dunno how I will manage twice a month and weekly appointments towards the end. And there isn't time to sit around and be sore or lie around with my feet up. There is far too much to do between girls, work and the house.
And this time, I feel like even though this pregnancy is way different than the previous two, I'm a bit more prepared for it this time. The second time every little thing made me worry because I hadn't dealt with it when I was pregnant the first time. Now it's "Eh, feels like stretching pains," or "Back pain from overdoing it," or "Cramps from not peeing often enough." I've been through pretty much all the normal stuff at this point, most of it twice, so I feel like I can trust my judgment on when I should worry and when to call the doctor. Maybe that just comes from being a more experienced mom at this point. It kinda helps prepare for a lot of different things.
I know that bringing home a new baby will be incredibly challenging. And I am going to try breastfeeding this time. So that's going to add a whole new level to the challenge. Last time I may have been overly optimistic. I wasn't prepared for how exhausted I was going to be or how difficult Evie would become. And nothing could have prepared me for the trial of having Elly hospitalized at 10 days old.
But I am excited and hopeful. The next 6 months are going to be busy, even without the pregnancy. With the pregnancy, it's going to be a bit wild. Elly's third and final procedure is next Friday. I have another doctor's appointment, including an ultrasound (YAY!) the next week. Evie's THIRD birthday is just a couple weeks after, with her third birthday party, which will be fun but a busy couple of days. Then September is my birthday, my nephew's second birthday and the big 20 week ultrasound. I will be finishing up Christmas shopping, picking out Halloween costumes, switching out summer wardrobe for winter, and finally getting to buy stuff for the new baby in October. Then there will be Halloween, decorating for fall, followed by Thanksgiving. I will, of course, be working on Turkey Day. But I'm hoping that my family will be able to get together that weekend for a big celebratory meal at my house. Hopefully my husband will let me decorate for Christmas the week of Thanksgiving again this year. I liked having the tree up and the house all pretty when family came last year. I would like to do that again. Then it will be my absolute favorite time of the year, CHRISTMAS! Sugar cookies, and gingerbread houses and lights and maybe a little snow. Christmas is going to be even more fun this year with Evie and Elly. And then once Christmas is over and the tree is packed back up and all the lights are put away...I will have between 4-6 weeks to get ready for a baby.
So see, it's really going to be a pretty busy rest of the year!
Wednesday, June 20, 2012
It's official
So. It's public. I am pregnant.
I've peed on a few sticks. Peed in a cup. And I've even seen the baby on an ultrasound!
So I'm really pregnant.
Before you even ask, yes, we wanted a third one. No, this is not an accident. Yes, we know what causes that. And no, we weren't trying for a boy, though my husband will probably dance a jig if this baby has dangley bits at the 20 week ultrasound.
I blogged a few months ago about the difficult decision to have additional children. After much discussion, my husband and I decided that we did want another child. Now, here we are. Number three is due in February 2013.
So far, things are going well. Morning sickness has been mild. I have been super exhausted and needing a lot of sleep. But as long as I go to bed when the girls do and don't stay up watching television, I feel okay. That means I'm getting about 9-10 hours of sleep most nights. Which is pretty crazy since I used to get about 6-8 hours of sleep. I am not doing nearly as much around the house as I was. My husband has banned me from using the stairs to the basement which means no more laundry. And he has been doing a LOT of the cooking and cleaning. I know I will have the energy to resume a lot of that once the first trimester is over, but for now it is REALLY nice to just rest. Means I get to spend a lot more time watching my babies play. And it's really touching that my husband has done so much to step up and help out.
I have also felt a lot more of the "stretching" pains super early. In the last two pregnancies, I remember having stretching pains, ligaments and joins and muscles that have to accommodate that big ole uterus, but it wasn't until I had a big ole uterus. Right now my uterus is about the size of an orange. Not really very big! So, I find the pains to be a little puzzling. But the nurses assure me it's completely normal, especially in later pregnancies. Apparently since my body has done this twice before, the moment those pregnancy hormones hit my body resumed "pregnancy mode."
Even though I'm only 6.5 weeks, I can already see a difference in my body. I haven't gained any pregnancy weight but my pants are tighter. My belly is bit more poochy. I'm looking forward to the bigger boobs. I have missed them! haha. But I didn't miss my clothes not fitting!
Only 5 weeks left of my first trimester. This pregnancy is already flying by! And I'm going to a new OB this time. Was tired of the drive to my old doctor and they have gotten so popular that it is nearly impossible to get an appointment. While I will miss the staff and familiarity of my previous doctor's office, it is nice to have a 10 minute drive instead of 30-45 minutes. And when I had some spotting/bleeding last week, my old doctor's office told me they could see me in July. The new one got me in yesterday. So, I'm already pretty happy with my decision.
I guess a new pregnancy will certainly give me something to blog about. Maybe I can remember to post more than once a month! haha. Maybe.
And I'm already having humorous preggo stories.
Like, when I first told Evie that we were going to have another baby, she literally got up and walked off. Told me that she didn't want to talk about it. Of course, later, she came back and asked questions. Wanted to make sure that the baby wasn't going to mess up her birthday (which is pretty huge for her right now!) and wanted to make sure that Christmas wouldn't be affected. I assured her that the baby wouldn't be here until after her birthday and Christmas. I also explained that Evie would be promoted to "Biggest" sister and Elly would become the "Big" sister and Evie was SUPER excited about that. Of course, Evie has told me she wants a little brother. We shall see.
Last week, I watched Tangled with my family, all of us piled up on the couch, and at the end when Eugene/Flynn dies I started crying. Now, I have seen this movie a hundred times. I have never cried, never even sniffled, when he died. This time it was full on fountain of tears. Evie took my hand and asked "Momma...what's wrong?" When I answered nothing, she continued to stare at me...a bit incredulous that I was crying. "Momma...this is a happy ending." Of course I couldn't explain silly hormones. "Momma, it's going to be okay. Rapunzel is going to heal him. It's okay." I'm not sure which of us was more relieved when I finally stopped crying. Josh laughed the whole time.
And just as a random side note: All I want to eat is Spam. Spam. Spam. And more spam. Yummy. Fried Eggs with fried spam on toast with mayo and a thick slice of cheddar cheese is HEAVENLY. It's the strangest thing.
Oh, and I've been having numerous zombie apocalypse dreams. Dunno what is up with that.
I've peed on a few sticks. Peed in a cup. And I've even seen the baby on an ultrasound!
So I'm really pregnant.
Before you even ask, yes, we wanted a third one. No, this is not an accident. Yes, we know what causes that. And no, we weren't trying for a boy, though my husband will probably dance a jig if this baby has dangley bits at the 20 week ultrasound.
I blogged a few months ago about the difficult decision to have additional children. After much discussion, my husband and I decided that we did want another child. Now, here we are. Number three is due in February 2013.
So far, things are going well. Morning sickness has been mild. I have been super exhausted and needing a lot of sleep. But as long as I go to bed when the girls do and don't stay up watching television, I feel okay. That means I'm getting about 9-10 hours of sleep most nights. Which is pretty crazy since I used to get about 6-8 hours of sleep. I am not doing nearly as much around the house as I was. My husband has banned me from using the stairs to the basement which means no more laundry. And he has been doing a LOT of the cooking and cleaning. I know I will have the energy to resume a lot of that once the first trimester is over, but for now it is REALLY nice to just rest. Means I get to spend a lot more time watching my babies play. And it's really touching that my husband has done so much to step up and help out.
I have also felt a lot more of the "stretching" pains super early. In the last two pregnancies, I remember having stretching pains, ligaments and joins and muscles that have to accommodate that big ole uterus, but it wasn't until I had a big ole uterus. Right now my uterus is about the size of an orange. Not really very big! So, I find the pains to be a little puzzling. But the nurses assure me it's completely normal, especially in later pregnancies. Apparently since my body has done this twice before, the moment those pregnancy hormones hit my body resumed "pregnancy mode."
Even though I'm only 6.5 weeks, I can already see a difference in my body. I haven't gained any pregnancy weight but my pants are tighter. My belly is bit more poochy. I'm looking forward to the bigger boobs. I have missed them! haha. But I didn't miss my clothes not fitting!
Only 5 weeks left of my first trimester. This pregnancy is already flying by! And I'm going to a new OB this time. Was tired of the drive to my old doctor and they have gotten so popular that it is nearly impossible to get an appointment. While I will miss the staff and familiarity of my previous doctor's office, it is nice to have a 10 minute drive instead of 30-45 minutes. And when I had some spotting/bleeding last week, my old doctor's office told me they could see me in July. The new one got me in yesterday. So, I'm already pretty happy with my decision.
I guess a new pregnancy will certainly give me something to blog about. Maybe I can remember to post more than once a month! haha. Maybe.
And I'm already having humorous preggo stories.
Like, when I first told Evie that we were going to have another baby, she literally got up and walked off. Told me that she didn't want to talk about it. Of course, later, she came back and asked questions. Wanted to make sure that the baby wasn't going to mess up her birthday (which is pretty huge for her right now!) and wanted to make sure that Christmas wouldn't be affected. I assured her that the baby wouldn't be here until after her birthday and Christmas. I also explained that Evie would be promoted to "Biggest" sister and Elly would become the "Big" sister and Evie was SUPER excited about that. Of course, Evie has told me she wants a little brother. We shall see.
Last week, I watched Tangled with my family, all of us piled up on the couch, and at the end when Eugene/Flynn dies I started crying. Now, I have seen this movie a hundred times. I have never cried, never even sniffled, when he died. This time it was full on fountain of tears. Evie took my hand and asked "Momma...what's wrong?" When I answered nothing, she continued to stare at me...a bit incredulous that I was crying. "Momma...this is a happy ending." Of course I couldn't explain silly hormones. "Momma, it's going to be okay. Rapunzel is going to heal him. It's okay." I'm not sure which of us was more relieved when I finally stopped crying. Josh laughed the whole time.
And just as a random side note: All I want to eat is Spam. Spam. Spam. And more spam. Yummy. Fried Eggs with fried spam on toast with mayo and a thick slice of cheddar cheese is HEAVENLY. It's the strangest thing.
Oh, and I've been having numerous zombie apocalypse dreams. Dunno what is up with that.
Tuesday, May 15, 2012
How Dare They Ask...
So, I know the Internet is absolutely going ape s*** over the Time magazine cover. And despite my initial reluctance to weigh in...I decided to do it.
I find the Time cover to be incredibly offensive.
There. I said it. I'm going to be honest though. I haven't read the story. And probably won't bring myself to. I have read stories and blogs on extended breastfeeding as well as attachment parenting. While I don't personally buy it, I believe that within reasonable limits, parents should be able to make choices regarding how they raise their children. And if they want to breastfeed their five year-old...more power to them. Ick. But whatever.
What I find so incredibly insulting is the accompanying headline, "Are You Mom Enough?".
How dare anyone call out mothers over something so silly and insignificant as how they choose to feed their child. With all the insanity in the world today bottle vs. breast seems to be getting way too much hype. I feel like it is for all the wrong reasons. Call moms out for spending more time with friends than their kids. Or for doing drugs in front of their kids. For texting and driving with their kids. Or for letting their kids watch age-inappropriate television. Whatever. But for using a bottle instead of a breast?!?
I support breast feeding. I have read the research supporting breastfeeding. But what I REALLY support is mothers. Mothers being able to care for their babies in the best way, not just for the baby, but for the whole family. Some women aren't comfortable with breastfeeding. Some women aren't able to breastfeed. And some women darn near kill themselves trying because they have been so guilted into it by some other woman's BS superiority complex. They push themselves so hard and feel worthless and useless because they can't feed their baby the way they have been told by all the "good" books that they should. Or maybe they are only able to feed for the first couple of days or the first couple of months. Maybe the baby has a milk allergy or reflux or a weak tongue or won't latch.
How dare ANYONE make that woman feel like less of a mom!!
I breastfed Evie for almost the first 6 weeks. Before returning to work, I introduced a bottle and when I did, my milk supply pretty much dried right up. Despite my intentions to continue breastfeeding part-time, my body was in an all or nothing sort of mood and chose to not cooperate. And I honestly was relieved. With bottles, other people could feed her. I could sleep. It was so much easier. But I felt pretty good for having tried.
With Elly, I chose to not even attempt breast feeding. Evie wasn't even 18 months old when she became a big sister. She was still a baby herself. And I knew before we even brought Elly home, that it was not going to be feasible for me to take care of my big baby and breastfeed my little baby. I knew I needed all the help I could get and one of the ways I was going to need help was going to be with feeding the little one. And obviously, if I chose to breastfeed, no one else would be able to help with that. Looking back, at times I wish I had tried to breastfeed her, but I know that it would not have worked and it would have left me even more exhausted and overwhelmed than I was.
I refused to feel guilty for not being able to feed Evie longer or for not choosing to breastfeed Elly. But I am not surprised by the number of mothers who do feel guilty and like less of a woman for not being willing or able to breastfeed. I am surprised by the continued attack on the those women.
As mothers, we need to stick together. I feel like one of my "responsibilities" as a mom is to help encourage and support fellow mothers. My greatest assets over the last 4 years, from first plus sign to now, has been my mom friends. Those with older children and those who are just starting. Because your whole life changes when you get pregnant. Above and beyond what you could ever dream. And once you see that mooshed up face and hear that first choked cry, you will never be the same. You really will spend the rest of your life with a big chunk of your heart walking around outside your body.
Being a mom is hard! And our partners in the parenthood experience, our husbands, generally don't understand what it truly means to be a mom, not REALLY. So who else can we turn to except other moms? And what will we do when in typical female fashion, we are all catty and snippy and hateful to those other moms? They didn't create healthy sleep patterns in their newborns, and they didn't wait to introduce solids, and they have a family bed, and their kid is a biter, and can you believe she chose to bottle feed that poor baby? Why do women do this to each other? It makes me sad for my daughters. I cherish my mom friends regardless of the different decisions that they made when it came to raising their children. I refuse to think less of them for those choices or to judge them. Though I do admit to occasional mom-envy: for a fellow mom's unbelievably well-mannered two-year-old or an almost-too-perfect marriage. I may not always agree with their parenting decisions, but I figure unless they're doing something to endanger the lives of their kids it's not my business.
If you want to breastfeed your child until they start middle school...whatever. If you answer your child's every whimper...more power to you. Just leave me out of it. I take very good care of my kids without dropping everything to run to their aid every time they make a displeased sound. Their boo-boos get kissed, they get plenty of hugs and snuggles, and I listen to them when they speak to me. But they also have to work through some of their own issues. They squabble some and they cry. They don't get what they want when they whine. (I hate hate hate whining!) I let them make mistakes because that is how they learn. I put them in time out when they mess up. I don't do everything right. I make mistakes. But I'm a good mom. Regardless of how long I breastfed.
I feel like Time did this piece only to receive this sensational response. Not really to raise awareness for a serious issue or promote anything. I don't feel like breastfeeding or attachment parenting is getting any "positive" press for this article. Instead it has drawn a line in the sand. Placing moms on each side with children in the middle.
I find the Time cover to be incredibly offensive.
There. I said it. I'm going to be honest though. I haven't read the story. And probably won't bring myself to. I have read stories and blogs on extended breastfeeding as well as attachment parenting. While I don't personally buy it, I believe that within reasonable limits, parents should be able to make choices regarding how they raise their children. And if they want to breastfeed their five year-old...more power to them. Ick. But whatever.
What I find so incredibly insulting is the accompanying headline, "Are You Mom Enough?".
How dare anyone call out mothers over something so silly and insignificant as how they choose to feed their child. With all the insanity in the world today bottle vs. breast seems to be getting way too much hype. I feel like it is for all the wrong reasons. Call moms out for spending more time with friends than their kids. Or for doing drugs in front of their kids. For texting and driving with their kids. Or for letting their kids watch age-inappropriate television. Whatever. But for using a bottle instead of a breast?!?
I support breast feeding. I have read the research supporting breastfeeding. But what I REALLY support is mothers. Mothers being able to care for their babies in the best way, not just for the baby, but for the whole family. Some women aren't comfortable with breastfeeding. Some women aren't able to breastfeed. And some women darn near kill themselves trying because they have been so guilted into it by some other woman's BS superiority complex. They push themselves so hard and feel worthless and useless because they can't feed their baby the way they have been told by all the "good" books that they should. Or maybe they are only able to feed for the first couple of days or the first couple of months. Maybe the baby has a milk allergy or reflux or a weak tongue or won't latch.
How dare ANYONE make that woman feel like less of a mom!!
I breastfed Evie for almost the first 6 weeks. Before returning to work, I introduced a bottle and when I did, my milk supply pretty much dried right up. Despite my intentions to continue breastfeeding part-time, my body was in an all or nothing sort of mood and chose to not cooperate. And I honestly was relieved. With bottles, other people could feed her. I could sleep. It was so much easier. But I felt pretty good for having tried.
With Elly, I chose to not even attempt breast feeding. Evie wasn't even 18 months old when she became a big sister. She was still a baby herself. And I knew before we even brought Elly home, that it was not going to be feasible for me to take care of my big baby and breastfeed my little baby. I knew I needed all the help I could get and one of the ways I was going to need help was going to be with feeding the little one. And obviously, if I chose to breastfeed, no one else would be able to help with that. Looking back, at times I wish I had tried to breastfeed her, but I know that it would not have worked and it would have left me even more exhausted and overwhelmed than I was.
I refused to feel guilty for not being able to feed Evie longer or for not choosing to breastfeed Elly. But I am not surprised by the number of mothers who do feel guilty and like less of a woman for not being willing or able to breastfeed. I am surprised by the continued attack on the those women.
As mothers, we need to stick together. I feel like one of my "responsibilities" as a mom is to help encourage and support fellow mothers. My greatest assets over the last 4 years, from first plus sign to now, has been my mom friends. Those with older children and those who are just starting. Because your whole life changes when you get pregnant. Above and beyond what you could ever dream. And once you see that mooshed up face and hear that first choked cry, you will never be the same. You really will spend the rest of your life with a big chunk of your heart walking around outside your body.
Being a mom is hard! And our partners in the parenthood experience, our husbands, generally don't understand what it truly means to be a mom, not REALLY. So who else can we turn to except other moms? And what will we do when in typical female fashion, we are all catty and snippy and hateful to those other moms? They didn't create healthy sleep patterns in their newborns, and they didn't wait to introduce solids, and they have a family bed, and their kid is a biter, and can you believe she chose to bottle feed that poor baby? Why do women do this to each other? It makes me sad for my daughters. I cherish my mom friends regardless of the different decisions that they made when it came to raising their children. I refuse to think less of them for those choices or to judge them. Though I do admit to occasional mom-envy: for a fellow mom's unbelievably well-mannered two-year-old or an almost-too-perfect marriage. I may not always agree with their parenting decisions, but I figure unless they're doing something to endanger the lives of their kids it's not my business.
If you want to breastfeed your child until they start middle school...whatever. If you answer your child's every whimper...more power to you. Just leave me out of it. I take very good care of my kids without dropping everything to run to their aid every time they make a displeased sound. Their boo-boos get kissed, they get plenty of hugs and snuggles, and I listen to them when they speak to me. But they also have to work through some of their own issues. They squabble some and they cry. They don't get what they want when they whine. (I hate hate hate whining!) I let them make mistakes because that is how they learn. I put them in time out when they mess up. I don't do everything right. I make mistakes. But I'm a good mom. Regardless of how long I breastfed.
I feel like Time did this piece only to receive this sensational response. Not really to raise awareness for a serious issue or promote anything. I don't feel like breastfeeding or attachment parenting is getting any "positive" press for this article. Instead it has drawn a line in the sand. Placing moms on each side with children in the middle.
Thursday, May 10, 2012
My New Thing
So I have recently somehow managed to discover that I love tea.
No. Not sweet tea. Yes, I have been drinking it all of my memorable life. And yes, I do love it.
But I have discovered that I LOVE - in all caps here - LOVE hot tea. It's become a neat sort of fascination. I've spent time online looking up new flavors to try and cannot wait to finish off a box so I can try something new.
Yeah...I'm pretty sure all my co-workers have decided that I've lost my mind.
It all started because I wanted to cut out my daily diet soda. Since I had Elly, I've only allowed myself one diet soda per day. Typically a Diet Dr. Pepper. And I drink it with my lunch every day. During my weight loss journey I read that a cup of hot Green Tea in the afternoon could help with weight loss. So I started drinking a hot tea in the afternoons with a small snack. And even though I'm not trying to lose weight now, I continue to have my cup of tea because I discovered I really enjoyed it.
Keep in mind, I'm the type of person who would love to sit around and drink hot coffee all day. Except I just cannot do the caffeine. If I have coffee in the afternoon, I'm up all night. So coffee was never an option. But tea, all teas, have dramatically less caffeine than a cup of coffee.
So, as I attempted to cut out my diet soda after reading yet another article about how bad artificial sweetener is for you, I replaced it with a cup of Earl Gray tea. And holy cow! I love it!
So then I start thinking...some mornings, I get a little jittery after my coffee. I know, I'm a total wuss. Two cups of coffee and I have the mid-morning jitters. But I love sipping a couple of cups of hot coffee during breakfast and while I read the news and emails in the morning. Sipping my coffee while I get ready. I need some caffeine but maybe I need a little less. So I tried replacing one of my cups of coffee with a cup of black tea. And by Jove! I love it!
So now I have cut out my serious coffee habit. And I haven't had any headaches or jitters. Although I think everyone has decided I might be the weirdest person they know...
No. Not sweet tea. Yes, I have been drinking it all of my memorable life. And yes, I do love it.
But I have discovered that I LOVE - in all caps here - LOVE hot tea. It's become a neat sort of fascination. I've spent time online looking up new flavors to try and cannot wait to finish off a box so I can try something new.
Yeah...I'm pretty sure all my co-workers have decided that I've lost my mind.
It all started because I wanted to cut out my daily diet soda. Since I had Elly, I've only allowed myself one diet soda per day. Typically a Diet Dr. Pepper. And I drink it with my lunch every day. During my weight loss journey I read that a cup of hot Green Tea in the afternoon could help with weight loss. So I started drinking a hot tea in the afternoons with a small snack. And even though I'm not trying to lose weight now, I continue to have my cup of tea because I discovered I really enjoyed it.
Keep in mind, I'm the type of person who would love to sit around and drink hot coffee all day. Except I just cannot do the caffeine. If I have coffee in the afternoon, I'm up all night. So coffee was never an option. But tea, all teas, have dramatically less caffeine than a cup of coffee.
So, as I attempted to cut out my diet soda after reading yet another article about how bad artificial sweetener is for you, I replaced it with a cup of Earl Gray tea. And holy cow! I love it!
So then I start thinking...some mornings, I get a little jittery after my coffee. I know, I'm a total wuss. Two cups of coffee and I have the mid-morning jitters. But I love sipping a couple of cups of hot coffee during breakfast and while I read the news and emails in the morning. Sipping my coffee while I get ready. I need some caffeine but maybe I need a little less. So I tried replacing one of my cups of coffee with a cup of black tea. And by Jove! I love it!
So now I have cut out my serious coffee habit. And I haven't had any headaches or jitters. Although I think everyone has decided I might be the weirdest person they know...
Screen Time Guilt
Am I the only parent who wrestles with guilt over screen time?
I am typically a bit of a Nazi about how much TV the girls watch. Or I try to be. Their TV time each day is pretty limited. And they don't get to play video games or on my phone or iPad unless its some sort of special event. The TV turns off at the same time every morning and we have plenty of non-tv time together daily.
However, I frequently worry about them watching too much television. Pediatricians recommend children 2 and up have no more than 2 hours of screen time per day. And we exceed that. Though that time isn't spent with them mindless watching television. I interact with them while they watch tv and they typically only half way watch the screen. Still, I worry.
On bad days, when the kids won't stop fighting or whining or I feel bad or none of slept the night before, the television is a great crutch. Turn it on and I can take a breath. There is thirty minutes of peace. But then I feel guilty about it. Should I have tried harder to make them play with some toys? Or sent them to their room? What could I have done differently?
Despite the guilt, sometimes you just have to do whatever you have to do for everyone to get through the day. Especially with babies, which I really feel both of mine still qualify as. Keeping everyone happy and healthy might balance out that extra episode or three of Dora.
And I certainly don't let my kids watch any "grown up" programming. So at least they aren't spending a couple hours a day watching violence or sex or learning bad language. So maybe it's not too bad.
I am typically a bit of a Nazi about how much TV the girls watch. Or I try to be. Their TV time each day is pretty limited. And they don't get to play video games or on my phone or iPad unless its some sort of special event. The TV turns off at the same time every morning and we have plenty of non-tv time together daily.
However, I frequently worry about them watching too much television. Pediatricians recommend children 2 and up have no more than 2 hours of screen time per day. And we exceed that. Though that time isn't spent with them mindless watching television. I interact with them while they watch tv and they typically only half way watch the screen. Still, I worry.
On bad days, when the kids won't stop fighting or whining or I feel bad or none of slept the night before, the television is a great crutch. Turn it on and I can take a breath. There is thirty minutes of peace. But then I feel guilty about it. Should I have tried harder to make them play with some toys? Or sent them to their room? What could I have done differently?
Despite the guilt, sometimes you just have to do whatever you have to do for everyone to get through the day. Especially with babies, which I really feel both of mine still qualify as. Keeping everyone happy and healthy might balance out that extra episode or three of Dora.
And I certainly don't let my kids watch any "grown up" programming. So at least they aren't spending a couple hours a day watching violence or sex or learning bad language. So maybe it's not too bad.
Elly's First Procedure
It has been more than two weeks since I posted. I am so sorry! I don't really have any good excuse. But anytime I get busy or get other things on my mind, it is hard to focus long enough to compose a blog.
Elly had her first laser procedure last Friday. I was not the emotional wreck that I anticipated I would be. In fact, I managed not to cry the whole time. It was really hard watching them take my baby away, back into the hospital. My tiny, precious girl who never leaves me unless she is with my mom or husband. She has stayed for a few hours alone with my step dad. But he has never taken her out anywhere alone. She's my little home body. But I didn't want to upset her by sitting around the hospital bawling while we waited for the nurses to take her back. And I didn't want to cry when she left me, because that would make leaving me scary. So I took deep breaths and reminded myself that everything was going to be fine and said half a dozen prayers.
Luckily, the procedure took almost no time. My mother and I went back out into the waiting room and got settled. We each checked email and Facebook on our phones. By the time we got bored with that and had each gotten out a book, the nurse was calling my name over the intercom. The walk to pick up the phone to talk to the doctor was scary, I have to say. That was the "Dear God, please let her be okay. Let her be fine. Please," moment of terror. It had gone so quickly that I couldn't believe that they were already done. I was terrified that something had gone wrong! But nope. She was fine. Doctor gave me a brief run down of how things went, what to do over the next couple of weeks and reminded me that his office would call me to set up the next appointment. Two hours after arriving at the hospital we were on our way home.
Her next procedure is in mid-June. Her eye doctors appointment is a few weeks away as well. The possibility of something being wrong with her eye is a little scary. But the fact that she's had no developmental delays or problems leads me to believe that she is probably fine. Still since the doctor recommended we get her checked, we are DEFINITELY getting her checked. With almost any medical issue, early treatment is key. So "let's wait and see" just won't cut it. Especially not with something so vital as eyes.
We will have at least 2 more trips to the hospital for laser procedures. Then one more follow up to see how the whole area has healed. Then hopefully we will be done and Elly will be free of this whole thing without even a memory of it!
Elly had her first laser procedure last Friday. I was not the emotional wreck that I anticipated I would be. In fact, I managed not to cry the whole time. It was really hard watching them take my baby away, back into the hospital. My tiny, precious girl who never leaves me unless she is with my mom or husband. She has stayed for a few hours alone with my step dad. But he has never taken her out anywhere alone. She's my little home body. But I didn't want to upset her by sitting around the hospital bawling while we waited for the nurses to take her back. And I didn't want to cry when she left me, because that would make leaving me scary. So I took deep breaths and reminded myself that everything was going to be fine and said half a dozen prayers.
Luckily, the procedure took almost no time. My mother and I went back out into the waiting room and got settled. We each checked email and Facebook on our phones. By the time we got bored with that and had each gotten out a book, the nurse was calling my name over the intercom. The walk to pick up the phone to talk to the doctor was scary, I have to say. That was the "Dear God, please let her be okay. Let her be fine. Please," moment of terror. It had gone so quickly that I couldn't believe that they were already done. I was terrified that something had gone wrong! But nope. She was fine. Doctor gave me a brief run down of how things went, what to do over the next couple of weeks and reminded me that his office would call me to set up the next appointment. Two hours after arriving at the hospital we were on our way home.
Her next procedure is in mid-June. Her eye doctors appointment is a few weeks away as well. The possibility of something being wrong with her eye is a little scary. But the fact that she's had no developmental delays or problems leads me to believe that she is probably fine. Still since the doctor recommended we get her checked, we are DEFINITELY getting her checked. With almost any medical issue, early treatment is key. So "let's wait and see" just won't cut it. Especially not with something so vital as eyes.
We will have at least 2 more trips to the hospital for laser procedures. Then one more follow up to see how the whole area has healed. Then hopefully we will be done and Elly will be free of this whole thing without even a memory of it!
Friday, April 20, 2012
Changes for Elly
Well, the past week has been a bit radical for little Elly.
First, she has progressed fully into the realm of toddler.
Second, she has completely abandoned the bottle.
Okay. So this isn't like nuclear fission kind of radical. But it's a little wild. And very cool.
I have decided that I really like the fact that Elly waited until she was 14 months old to walk. Really! I mean, I know I have spent almost 6 months worrying if something might be wrong with her or if she was ever going to walk since she didn't start at 10 months like big sister. But unlike Evie, who spent her first several months of walking falling into stuff, Elly hasn't fallen. Like at all. No bumps and no bruises. Only one tip over that caused a big meltdown. And of course she wasn't hurt then. Just wounded pride.
Once I got over the worrying, it has been a much less stressful experience. I spent all my time with Evie trying to keep her from breaking herself. And feeling super embarrassed going out into public with a baby that looked like I beat her with a sack of bricks.
Last night we had our first big game of chase. Evie is a big fan of running through the house screaming after each other. And for the first time Elly got to participate. I'm not sure Evie knew what to think. But Elly loved it! She laughed so hard she couldn't breathe. hehe. Too precious. I really need to get it on video.
And as of last Saturday, Elly no longer gets a bottle. And I'm a little sad. Especially since Elly doesn't care. No. Really. She doesn't care. I just told her that we weren't doing a bottle anymore. And she hasn't asked for it once. She just gets a small cup of milk during the same time. And she wants to drink it sitting in her little chair, not snuggled up in my lap like we did with the bottle. But thankfully, she wants to come snuggle after the milk and after we brush their teeth. So I do still get some loving time! But it makes me sad that she didn't miss the bottle.
So our next step will be ditching the paci. Then potty training and moving to a big bed. Eesh.
We have already cut back the pacifier to naps and bed time only. So it won't be hard to cut it out the rest of the time. Hopefully. She is cutting more teeth now, and I have always heard that pacifier sucking can help ease that pain. So I will wait until after she cuts these to take away the paci. But we might as well go ahead and do it.
After that I'm not sure which to do first. Evie did bed, then bottles, then paci then potty. I don't know if there is an issue with potty training while a child is still in a crib or not. Crib kind of screams baby. While potty training is definitely a big kid thing. So seems like we should do bed first. And I don't know that Elly and I are ready for that. Probably mostly me. Since Elly does fine climbing in and out of her sister's bed. But right now I can put her in her crib, close the door and be done with her for the night. If she wants to play, she plays and then she goes to sleep. With Evie we certainly don't have the battles we used to have at bed time, however, there is a certain amount of reminding and reasoning that we do every night.
"Remember, you have to stay in bed, Evie."
"How do dinosaurs say good night, Evie?"
"If you get up again I will take Duck away!"
You get the idea. Some nights it's merely a "Good night Evie!" "Good night Momma." "Sweet dreams Evie." "Sweet dreams Momma." "Love you Evie." "Love you too Momma." And I close the door and don't see her until 8 a.m. the next day. Sometimes I put her to bed at 10 p.m. and I am in there seizing stuffed animals still at 10:30 p.m. while she pleads and begs to get back up. But the bad nights are less and less common. So I'm hesitant to throw any premature wrenches in what seems to be a well-oiled bed time routine.
So what age is the "right age" to move to a bed?
Evie moved into a toddler bed at her first birthday. I think life might have been simpler if we had kept her in a crib longer. BUT I don't know that we had more problems than we would have had if we had waited.
The other challenge for when Elly moves into a bed will be the fact that Evie and Elly are going to be sharing a room. That will be a whole new challenge I'm sure.
So I guess we will go with paci, bed, then potty? Maybe we will all be ready for the bed transition by Evie's third birthday this August. Then start potty training Elly around her second birthday. Maybe after. I have learned the hard way with Evie that it will be easier to wait until she's ready. Rather than dealing with panties and pull ups and clean ups. Waiting until she's older and ready will be easier in the long run. Even if it means she spends more time in diapers. At her age she's only using three or four diapers a day. So it's less than $1 per day in diapers. I probably spend more than that in soap, water, time and aggravation on a day when Evie decides that she doesn't want to be potty trained. So I think that it will be worth the wait.
I don't look forward to changes in our routine causing upheaval, especially at bed time. But it'll be nice when the girls are snoozing together. And of course, change is just part of lil Elly growing up!
First, she has progressed fully into the realm of toddler.
Second, she has completely abandoned the bottle.
Okay. So this isn't like nuclear fission kind of radical. But it's a little wild. And very cool.
I have decided that I really like the fact that Elly waited until she was 14 months old to walk. Really! I mean, I know I have spent almost 6 months worrying if something might be wrong with her or if she was ever going to walk since she didn't start at 10 months like big sister. But unlike Evie, who spent her first several months of walking falling into stuff, Elly hasn't fallen. Like at all. No bumps and no bruises. Only one tip over that caused a big meltdown. And of course she wasn't hurt then. Just wounded pride.
Once I got over the worrying, it has been a much less stressful experience. I spent all my time with Evie trying to keep her from breaking herself. And feeling super embarrassed going out into public with a baby that looked like I beat her with a sack of bricks.
Last night we had our first big game of chase. Evie is a big fan of running through the house screaming after each other. And for the first time Elly got to participate. I'm not sure Evie knew what to think. But Elly loved it! She laughed so hard she couldn't breathe. hehe. Too precious. I really need to get it on video.
And as of last Saturday, Elly no longer gets a bottle. And I'm a little sad. Especially since Elly doesn't care. No. Really. She doesn't care. I just told her that we weren't doing a bottle anymore. And she hasn't asked for it once. She just gets a small cup of milk during the same time. And she wants to drink it sitting in her little chair, not snuggled up in my lap like we did with the bottle. But thankfully, she wants to come snuggle after the milk and after we brush their teeth. So I do still get some loving time! But it makes me sad that she didn't miss the bottle.
So our next step will be ditching the paci. Then potty training and moving to a big bed. Eesh.
We have already cut back the pacifier to naps and bed time only. So it won't be hard to cut it out the rest of the time. Hopefully. She is cutting more teeth now, and I have always heard that pacifier sucking can help ease that pain. So I will wait until after she cuts these to take away the paci. But we might as well go ahead and do it.
After that I'm not sure which to do first. Evie did bed, then bottles, then paci then potty. I don't know if there is an issue with potty training while a child is still in a crib or not. Crib kind of screams baby. While potty training is definitely a big kid thing. So seems like we should do bed first. And I don't know that Elly and I are ready for that. Probably mostly me. Since Elly does fine climbing in and out of her sister's bed. But right now I can put her in her crib, close the door and be done with her for the night. If she wants to play, she plays and then she goes to sleep. With Evie we certainly don't have the battles we used to have at bed time, however, there is a certain amount of reminding and reasoning that we do every night.
"Remember, you have to stay in bed, Evie."
"How do dinosaurs say good night, Evie?"
"If you get up again I will take Duck away!"
You get the idea. Some nights it's merely a "Good night Evie!" "Good night Momma." "Sweet dreams Evie." "Sweet dreams Momma." "Love you Evie." "Love you too Momma." And I close the door and don't see her until 8 a.m. the next day. Sometimes I put her to bed at 10 p.m. and I am in there seizing stuffed animals still at 10:30 p.m. while she pleads and begs to get back up. But the bad nights are less and less common. So I'm hesitant to throw any premature wrenches in what seems to be a well-oiled bed time routine.
So what age is the "right age" to move to a bed?
Evie moved into a toddler bed at her first birthday. I think life might have been simpler if we had kept her in a crib longer. BUT I don't know that we had more problems than we would have had if we had waited.
The other challenge for when Elly moves into a bed will be the fact that Evie and Elly are going to be sharing a room. That will be a whole new challenge I'm sure.
So I guess we will go with paci, bed, then potty? Maybe we will all be ready for the bed transition by Evie's third birthday this August. Then start potty training Elly around her second birthday. Maybe after. I have learned the hard way with Evie that it will be easier to wait until she's ready. Rather than dealing with panties and pull ups and clean ups. Waiting until she's older and ready will be easier in the long run. Even if it means she spends more time in diapers. At her age she's only using three or four diapers a day. So it's less than $1 per day in diapers. I probably spend more than that in soap, water, time and aggravation on a day when Evie decides that she doesn't want to be potty trained. So I think that it will be worth the wait.
I don't look forward to changes in our routine causing upheaval, especially at bed time. But it'll be nice when the girls are snoozing together. And of course, change is just part of lil Elly growing up!
Friday, April 13, 2012
The Decision to Expand...or not?
When I was pregnant with Elly, I worried frequently about how Evie would handle life with a sibling. How we would ever have enough time to spend time with both girls? A part of me feared that we were ruining Evie's life by bringing another little person into it. Another part dreamed of the close friends they would become, of their precious giggles as they splashed in the bath, and the joyful racket on Christmas with both girls tearing into presents.
I'm sure most parents struggle with similar back and forth when they add to their family. A mixture of joy and guilt. I completely understand why so many choose to have just one child. It's hard to struggle with a decision that's not just going to affect you and your husband. But affect other little lives. Forever. Think how much different one will grow up...an only child. One child of two. Or maybe one child of many. Each is a dramatically different life path.
I didn't always know if I wanted kids. And when I had Evie I loved her so much I didn't know whether or not I wanted more. Didn't know how I could love someone else the way I loved my Evie. How I could love someone else as much as I loved my Evie. When Elly came along I found I was partially right...I didn't love her the same way I loved Evie. I don't think you can love any two people in the SAME way. Evie will always have a special love. Just as Elly will always have a special love.
Our first six months was incredibly hard. I think it always is when your life changes so dramatically. With Elly sick, then jaundiced, then colicky...and Evie still not talking. Life was incredibly difficult. And during that time we swore off having any more kids. Simply couldn't imagine putting all of us through that again.
But I have always been told that when you're done...you just KNOW. You have that second baby and life is complete. Or you have that first baby and life is complete.
And recently, I've come to the realization that the gosh awful baby phase, the one full of sleepless nights and spit up and poopy diapers, it doesn't last very long. A year of Elly's life has flown by in an instant. Nearly three years of Evie's life have passed in the blink of an eye. The days will come far too soon when my babies aren't dragging me out of bed in the morning, and instead it is me dragging them. It won't be very long before my Friday nights are not spent refereeing an argument over who gets to sit on my lap while we watch Cinderella. So it seems awfully unfair to make a lifelong decision based on a miserable 6 months.
Watching the girls play in the living room floor, I feel like someone is missing. Just maybe.
No, I do not have baby fever. I don't look at pregnant women and dream about returning to that state of swollen ankles and not being able to wear my clothes. I don't glimpse families toting ginormous infant carriers and long to have those days back. Nor do I see darling babies and miss the bottles and the burping and the days of a little being that has minimal personality and does nothing but eat and sleep. If I could somehow skip the first six months of having a third child I might just sign right up. Maybe.
Children are an amazing, wonderful, impossible blessing.
There are moments when I look at my two girls and wonder how on earth I could want anything more. How unbelievably greedy of me. And there are moments when the very idea of adding another voice to the chaos of yelling and crying and screaming makes me feel like I should have a drink and then check myself into the closest mental health facility.
In closing let me state, quite conclusively, that there will NOT be an addition to the family any time soon. I am not pregnant now. And do not intend to be pregnant soon. And I don't know that we will have a third one. It is quite a hefty decision. No permanent decisions have been made. But who knows. Maybe once the girls are off to school and things have settled down. Or maybe by then I will be far too attached to sleeping through the night to worry about that missing person.
I'm sure most parents struggle with similar back and forth when they add to their family. A mixture of joy and guilt. I completely understand why so many choose to have just one child. It's hard to struggle with a decision that's not just going to affect you and your husband. But affect other little lives. Forever. Think how much different one will grow up...an only child. One child of two. Or maybe one child of many. Each is a dramatically different life path.
I didn't always know if I wanted kids. And when I had Evie I loved her so much I didn't know whether or not I wanted more. Didn't know how I could love someone else the way I loved my Evie. How I could love someone else as much as I loved my Evie. When Elly came along I found I was partially right...I didn't love her the same way I loved Evie. I don't think you can love any two people in the SAME way. Evie will always have a special love. Just as Elly will always have a special love.
Our first six months was incredibly hard. I think it always is when your life changes so dramatically. With Elly sick, then jaundiced, then colicky...and Evie still not talking. Life was incredibly difficult. And during that time we swore off having any more kids. Simply couldn't imagine putting all of us through that again.
But I have always been told that when you're done...you just KNOW. You have that second baby and life is complete. Or you have that first baby and life is complete.
And recently, I've come to the realization that the gosh awful baby phase, the one full of sleepless nights and spit up and poopy diapers, it doesn't last very long. A year of Elly's life has flown by in an instant. Nearly three years of Evie's life have passed in the blink of an eye. The days will come far too soon when my babies aren't dragging me out of bed in the morning, and instead it is me dragging them. It won't be very long before my Friday nights are not spent refereeing an argument over who gets to sit on my lap while we watch Cinderella. So it seems awfully unfair to make a lifelong decision based on a miserable 6 months.
Watching the girls play in the living room floor, I feel like someone is missing. Just maybe.
No, I do not have baby fever. I don't look at pregnant women and dream about returning to that state of swollen ankles and not being able to wear my clothes. I don't glimpse families toting ginormous infant carriers and long to have those days back. Nor do I see darling babies and miss the bottles and the burping and the days of a little being that has minimal personality and does nothing but eat and sleep. If I could somehow skip the first six months of having a third child I might just sign right up. Maybe.
Children are an amazing, wonderful, impossible blessing.
There are moments when I look at my two girls and wonder how on earth I could want anything more. How unbelievably greedy of me. And there are moments when the very idea of adding another voice to the chaos of yelling and crying and screaming makes me feel like I should have a drink and then check myself into the closest mental health facility.
In closing let me state, quite conclusively, that there will NOT be an addition to the family any time soon. I am not pregnant now. And do not intend to be pregnant soon. And I don't know that we will have a third one. It is quite a hefty decision. No permanent decisions have been made. But who knows. Maybe once the girls are off to school and things have settled down. Or maybe by then I will be far too attached to sleeping through the night to worry about that missing person.
Dealing with Loss
Losing a family member is never easy.
Not even when that family member is tiny, four-legged, fuzzy and isn’t really “gone.”
In spring 2008, Josh bought me Mushu, a Yorkie-Shih Tzu mix, as a combo anniversary and birthday present. Mushu was a teensy ball of fuzz and he was really our first baby. Unfortunately for Mushu, in August of 2009 we had a real baby. A human baby. When little Evie came along I was not sure how Mushu would deal. I thought he would hate her. Be jealous. Maybe even bite her. But he didn’t.
Instead he became very protective. And as a result very stressed.
By the time Elly came along, Mushu’s protectiveness had turned into violence. Not towards any of us. But towards anyone who came to our house. Or near our yard for that matter.
Mushu preferred to spend much of his time outside. We had a wireless electric fence and Mushu and our beagle, Emily, each had collars. So Mushu could pass much of his day running around the yard doing whatever he pleased. But this meant that when the mail ran Mushu was typically in the yard. Same goes for UPS, visitors, neighbors, whoever. And Mushu started to bite.
Now, fully grown Mushu weighed a whopping 8 lbs. He was certainly no Rottweiler barreling down on you. But he was fast, and due to his size most people ignored him. Even after I would TELL them that he would bite. They just marched on up to the porch. Usually getting nipped on the calf as a result.
It started off that his bites were pretty light and tentative. Never broke the skin or did damage. But over the last six months, Mushu’s bite has gotten much more serious. It escalated into a very bad bite on the calf of one of our friends who came by after church a few weeks ago.
We could take no more.
I started talking about rehoming him through one of the local rescue groups.
I cried to my husband. I cried to my mom. I cried alone in my car. I cried about it a lot.
I certainly didn’t want to get rid of Mushu. But I couldn’t have him biting everyone who came to my house. And I didn’t want to risk him escalating further and possibly biting one of us, maybe even one of the kids.
I felt like my hands were tied. Mushu had to go.
And he did.
Mushu seems to be much happier. He loves us, I know. And he loves the girls. But he just couldn’t handle the stress of my girls 24/7.
Fortunately for Mushu, and for us, my mom had developed something of a soft spot for Mushu over the last four years. And she knew that he had developed a soft spot for her over the last year coming to day care. So, Mushu has moved to my mom’s house. We still get to see him 3 or 4 days a week when the girls go there for day care. But then the girls go home and he gets a break. Mushu loves it. He is getting the best of both worlds. He gets the stability and quiet of my mom’s house with the fun and love of family when the girls are there. Now I don’t have to worry about him eating up some of our visitors. But I know he is well taken care of and loved.
I have still missed him. It’s been really weird not having him around the house. Much quieter, for one thing. But it has been nice not to worry about whether or not the mail was going to run when he was outside or making sure he was put up before anyone came to visit.
Now we have to make sure that Maiko doesn’t grow up to be a psycho attack dog…*sigh*
New phase of terrible twos
So, when you hear people discussing the terrible twos, they all tell you about the tantrums. The arguing and the “no’s” and the horrifying outbursts in public places.
Everyone failed to tell me about the whining.
I think they must have just subconsciously blocked it from their minds. Because when you ask a fellow, more seasoned parent, about this horrific whining phase…a look of shock seems to cross their face, followed by a panicked memory, and completed by a look of shared misery. Ah yes. They remember the whining. It seems that girls may be worse than boys for the whining. While boys are worse for the public outbursts. And boys seem to have cornered the market on deliberate destruction. Because despite my two in terrible twos, minus one disgusting fish food experience, there hasn’t been a lot of destruction. Deliberate or otherwise.
Not to say my girls don’t tear stuff up. But they’ve never given an iPod a bath. Nor have they colored the walls or rubbed play-doh into the carpet. You give them a magazine and the go ahead and they’ll give you back confetti in less than 10 minutes. Heck, let them accidentally get ahold of a magazine without immediately shrieking no and seizing it and you’ll have confetti in 15 minutes. It takes them a little longer to shred a magazine quietly.
And there have been two hurricane glass fatalities. One of which was caused by my husband. And several chewed up crayons. A few ripped books with chewed corners. All in all, three years with pretty minimal loss.
But the whining.
Holy cow.
I’d rather hear nails on a chalk board for an hour straight instead of 10 minutes of a two year old whining. It is HORRIBLE.
I’ve tried ignoring it. Whining back. Ignoring it some more. Asking her to stop. Yelling at her to stop. Leaving the room. Leaving the house.
Nothing really seems to work.
So, really. What’s up with the whining? The worst part is that my typically happy-go-lucky Elly seems to be affected by her sister’s whining and usually follows suit with crankiness of her own.
There have been some changes for Evie lately. She is beginning to transition out of napping, going from a 3 hour siesta to a mere 45-90 minutes if anything. This has meant a slightly earlier bed time and a slightly later wake up call. Which I have enjoyed. But it has also meant more entertaining of the toddler. Most days this isn’t a problem for me. I just put her to work. Last weekend we cleaned out the basement and the week before she helped me get all the outside toys out of the building. But some days I just really REALLY need a break. And Evie won’t let me have it.
And when I’ve had no break and there is a lot of non-stop whining…well, it can lead to a stressful evening in the Dowd household.
So, why does she whine? Your guess is as good as mine. Maybe just practicing a new form of communication? Dealing with growth and changes? I don’t know.
But how do we deal with the whining? Just stick it out and hope she outgrows it?
Pointers please?
Preparing for Surgery
I think one of the scariest things to hear as a parent is that something might be wrong with your child. Like…really wrong. Or even the possibility that something could maybe be wrong…even when it is contrary to what you have seen over the last 12 months.
I have blogged before about Elly’s “birthmark” or her boo-boo as Evie calls it. The plastic surgeon that her pediatrician referred us to was pretty confident that the place was a hemangioma. They are largely harmless and the only potential complication was if it grew and interfered with her eye. After a year of plastic surgery visits and check-ups, the doctor now says it is NOT a hemangioma. Yeah. Frustration.
The doctor said at our last visit that he believes Elly has a vascular abnormality. I don’t suppose it really changes our view on the last 12 months or anything. But it does change our future. Unlike a hemangioma, a vascular abnormality will not fade on its own. So the doctor wants to go ahead and perform several laser treatments.
Also, with vascular abnormalities there is a risk of other complications. The doctor said that with it being so close to her eye, she could have abnormalities inside her eye, putting her at risk for vision issues and glaucoma. He told us to schedule an eye check and said that she may need yearly eye exams for the rest of her life. In addition, there could be vessel clumps on Elly’s brain. These abnormalities could cause seizures, learning problems and developmental issues.
Insert heart stopping terror here.
Yeah.
The doctor added that the brain abnormalities were very rare and the fact that Elly hasn’t had any complications, either in the form of delays or seizures, by her age then she probably doesn’t have any problems.
To be safe, we do have an appointment with a pediatric ophthalmologist. Try to say that three times fast. It’s at the end of May. In the meantime, we get to prepare ourselves for Elly’s “surgery.” She will be undergoing three laser treatments on the abnormality on her face. The treatments will be about 6 weeks apart. So May, June and July. Hopefully by Evie’s third birthday Sissy will be all done and no more big boo-boo on her face.
On May 3, we find out what time we need to be at Baptist hospital.
And on Friday, May 4, we take Elly to Baptist, hand her over to the anesthesiologists and sit in a waiting room to pray.
The surgeon said that the whole procedure will probably only take an hour. The actual laser treatment will only take about 10 minutes. But Elly will have to be put under for it. Which scares me to death, just to be honest. He said the laser won’t cause any blistering, so there won’t be any bandaging to deal with or anything. Hopefully pain will be minimal to non-existent.
I’m a little aggravated with the doctor for not having told me a year ago that the mark might have been something far worse than a hemangioma. Although the doctor said that even if there had been complications like a vascular abnormality on Elly’s brain, the only thing we could do would be medicate her to treat her symptoms. Meds to prevent seizures, therapy for delays, etc. And me knowing that her birthmark might have caused other problems would have just lead to wasteful fretting and worrying. Probably for nothing. So I suppose it truly worked out for the best how it has.
All in all, I’m trying not to worry about it. I’m hoping and praying and giving her lots of extra kisses. It’s a huge challenge to not worry. Especially for ME. Your prayers over the next few months will be really appreciated.
Friday, March 30, 2012
A Lent Without Facebook
Nearly six weeks has passed since I gave up Facebook. And it has been far more difficult than I would like to admit. The first week or so, I would catch myself opening up the Facebook app on my phone without thinking about it. It was that ingrained in my routine. I get a lot of status updates as text messages which I hadn’t thought to discontinue prior to saying adieu, so I have continued to hear “from” some of my friends. But it has been difficult not to reply. Especially to those “friend in need” updates. The ones where I would typically post something encouraging or a “been there” story. You know, friends in need of a positive word.
The hardest part has been not seeing the updates from my mom on what the girls are up to. She typically posts photos and videos of what the girls do during the day while I’m at work and I love getting to keep up with them when I’m away. It’s been weird to hear about what they’re up to third party. Like, co-workers coming into work and saying “I saw your girls jumping on the trampoline. They are so cute!” or “I loved that video of Evie and Elly!” when I haven’t seen the videos myself.
As much as I have missed Facebook at times, it has been so wonderful to be free of it. I spent a lot of time updating statuses and uploading photos and checking on what everyone else was up to. It’s been a big relief to not spend the time. But it’s been sad to not be able to talk to my friends. To not share my good days and bad days. To not share pictures of my sweet girls. To not know what my family and friends that I see only rarely are up to.
My respite from Facebook has been refreshing. I will have a much greater appreciation for the connections that I have through the social networking site when I start back up. Assuming of course that everyone hasn’t forgotten about me. But when I return I think I will continue to try to limit the time I invest. And if I log in and have 0 friends…I suppose that will be much easier!
The hardest part has been not seeing the updates from my mom on what the girls are up to. She typically posts photos and videos of what the girls do during the day while I’m at work and I love getting to keep up with them when I’m away. It’s been weird to hear about what they’re up to third party. Like, co-workers coming into work and saying “I saw your girls jumping on the trampoline. They are so cute!” or “I loved that video of Evie and Elly!” when I haven’t seen the videos myself.
As much as I have missed Facebook at times, it has been so wonderful to be free of it. I spent a lot of time updating statuses and uploading photos and checking on what everyone else was up to. It’s been a big relief to not spend the time. But it’s been sad to not be able to talk to my friends. To not share my good days and bad days. To not share pictures of my sweet girls. To not know what my family and friends that I see only rarely are up to.
My respite from Facebook has been refreshing. I will have a much greater appreciation for the connections that I have through the social networking site when I start back up. Assuming of course that everyone hasn’t forgotten about me. But when I return I think I will continue to try to limit the time I invest. And if I log in and have 0 friends…I suppose that will be much easier!
Friday, March 23, 2012
Sharing a tag
I know I've written about this before. But my girls are ever on my mind. And their relationship with each other is forefront. As their parent, there will come a time (God willing MANY years from now) when I won't be there for them. But as sisters, and less than two years between them, they will have each other their whole lives. And I want so much for them to be close.
When I found out that I was going to be the mother of sisters I dreamed of the day they would share clothes, a room. When they'd build forts and dress up as princesses and giggle doing each others make up. Sharing ice cream cones, secrets, heart breaks and lipstick.
When I was young I always wanted a sister. I imagined we would be closer than best friends. So I'm really hoping that dream is fulfilled with my girls.
And despite my fears and worries, we seem to be headed in the right direction!
Evie and Elly are talking to each other now and interacting more. Evie talks to Elly now instead of at her and about her like she used to. Evie shares thing with Elly and wants Sissy to do things that she does. Evie even likes to take turns...sometimes. And she plays "interpreter" for Elly at times, especially by telling when Elly has a dirty diaper. As if everyone couldn't smell it! Haha.
It makes me unbelievably happy and relieved to see these changes. And now they're very close to sharing clothes! Though Evie is not particularly happy about that. Elly is now wearing Evie's stuff from last summer. There have been a few disputes over pajamas and a couple other cherished outfits. Elly just loves new clothes. She doesn't understand that the clothes are hand-me-downs. And doesn't care. Evie however remembers wearing Elly's "new" Dora pajamas and Dog shirt and striped shorts. Some of the items Evie can still technically wear, they're just tight or short or whatever. So I've moved them on to Elly.
So they're sort of sharing clothes. And they're playing together. And if you count a dirty diaper as a secret...haha.
When I found out that I was going to be the mother of sisters I dreamed of the day they would share clothes, a room. When they'd build forts and dress up as princesses and giggle doing each others make up. Sharing ice cream cones, secrets, heart breaks and lipstick.
When I was young I always wanted a sister. I imagined we would be closer than best friends. So I'm really hoping that dream is fulfilled with my girls.
And despite my fears and worries, we seem to be headed in the right direction!
Evie and Elly are talking to each other now and interacting more. Evie talks to Elly now instead of at her and about her like she used to. Evie shares thing with Elly and wants Sissy to do things that she does. Evie even likes to take turns...sometimes. And she plays "interpreter" for Elly at times, especially by telling when Elly has a dirty diaper. As if everyone couldn't smell it! Haha.
It makes me unbelievably happy and relieved to see these changes. And now they're very close to sharing clothes! Though Evie is not particularly happy about that. Elly is now wearing Evie's stuff from last summer. There have been a few disputes over pajamas and a couple other cherished outfits. Elly just loves new clothes. She doesn't understand that the clothes are hand-me-downs. And doesn't care. Evie however remembers wearing Elly's "new" Dora pajamas and Dog shirt and striped shorts. Some of the items Evie can still technically wear, they're just tight or short or whatever. So I've moved them on to Elly.
So they're sort of sharing clothes. And they're playing together. And if you count a dirty diaper as a secret...haha.
Tuesday, March 6, 2012
Believe Tattoo
So those who knew me growing up know what an active and vivid imagination I always had. Even now, bogged down with the day to day grind of babies and work and chores I try to read a good fantasy book, keep in touch with my inner child, do something creative etc. on a regular basis. I firmly believe that anything is possible if you set your heart to it. It is so important to have belief. In yourself. In God. After growing two beautiful little girls in my body I don't think I could ever doubt the existence of God. I don't see how anyone could. A cluster of cells growing into a living, breathing person! It's a miracle if I've ever heard of one.
I have been wanting another tattoo and wanted it to be special and something that was at least in some way for my girls.
And this is it. Josh doesn't get it but it's okay. The word believe wraps up into a dandelion puff and the seeds are blowing off and as they float away they turn into sparrows. The tattoo wraps around my foot.
The 2 stars next to "believe" stand for my 2 girls. Who I will always support and believe in. Even if I don't agree with them. The dandelion puff is a symbol of wishes to be made and wishes granted. I can remember blowing all the seeds off dandelions and making wishes when I was little. It kinda symbolizes the hope and dreams of childhood. The seeds symbolize abundance and fruits of labor. Dandelion juices can be used medicinally in tea as well as to fight bacteria and heal wounds.
The sparrows mean a lot to me. They are one of the most common birds around here and probably really under appreciated. Sparrows are never alone and as such are a great symbol for family and togetherness. They are also the smallest birds but I always think of the hymn when I see them. How God is always watching over the little sparrow. Also when I was young I heard the superstition that sparrows are believed to carry the souls of the dead into the next life and their was something so eerie about it that I have been really fascinated with them ever since!
The fact that the dandelion seeds are turning into the sparrows is supposed to be symbolic of magic and faith.
So. That is that. Does anyone else have any tattoos? Want any? I actually want more. They are creepily addictive. I know I want one down my ribs. A quote that has significance for me and is about my hubby. And I would like to get something on my bicep. But I don't know what! And I kinda want my two big back pieces colored in.
So see. They're addictive!
I have been wanting another tattoo and wanted it to be special and something that was at least in some way for my girls.
And this is it. Josh doesn't get it but it's okay. The word believe wraps up into a dandelion puff and the seeds are blowing off and as they float away they turn into sparrows. The tattoo wraps around my foot.
The 2 stars next to "believe" stand for my 2 girls. Who I will always support and believe in. Even if I don't agree with them. The dandelion puff is a symbol of wishes to be made and wishes granted. I can remember blowing all the seeds off dandelions and making wishes when I was little. It kinda symbolizes the hope and dreams of childhood. The seeds symbolize abundance and fruits of labor. Dandelion juices can be used medicinally in tea as well as to fight bacteria and heal wounds.
The sparrows mean a lot to me. They are one of the most common birds around here and probably really under appreciated. Sparrows are never alone and as such are a great symbol for family and togetherness. They are also the smallest birds but I always think of the hymn when I see them. How God is always watching over the little sparrow. Also when I was young I heard the superstition that sparrows are believed to carry the souls of the dead into the next life and their was something so eerie about it that I have been really fascinated with them ever since!
The fact that the dandelion seeds are turning into the sparrows is supposed to be symbolic of magic and faith.
So. That is that. Does anyone else have any tattoos? Want any? I actually want more. They are creepily addictive. I know I want one down my ribs. A quote that has significance for me and is about my hubby. And I would like to get something on my bicep. But I don't know what! And I kinda want my two big back pieces colored in.
So see. They're addictive!
A month without Facebook
So I’ve been off Facebook for like…two weeks now? Only two weeks? It feels like an eternity. My Facebook app is sitting on my phone mocking me with its little notification bubble at the top right corner. I have 54 notifications so far. I’m sure by Easter that will have doubled. Maybe even quadrupled. I am really missing keeping up with my friends. And it has been hard to keep myself from thinking in “status updates.” And to not post adorable pics of my little people doing the adorable things my little people do.
On the flip side it has been really nice to spend less time feeding the addiction that is Facebook. It has been a little weird to not know what’s going on, to ignore status updates and messages and pokes or not to be posting things like “Had an awesome day!” or “Elly just took her first steps!” I haven’t shared pictures of my new tattoo or uploaded any videos of Evie singing. Definitely just weird.
I gave up Facebook for Lent. And so far it has definitely been a challenge and a sacrifice. I considered several other things, like chocolate or wine, and while those would have certainly been missed they wouldn’t have been irreplaceable voids in my daily life. I’m kinda trying to regain some religious focus in my life and felt like giving up something really hard for Lent was a good place to start. My family hasn’t really been going to church recently, especially since some interpersonal drama has been going on at the church where I am technically a member. Not being on Facebook has reduced all the social media noise in my life.
So, what am I up to? What have I been doing since I gave up Facebook?
Well, this past Sunday the Dowd family went to Mass at the Catholic church in Mount Airy. I have enjoyed every time I have been there in the past. Since the first time I went back when I was preggo with little Evie I have felt something…a push, a desire, whatever…making me want to go back. My husband works late and isn’t usually able to accompany us to church and with the girls I am a bit outnumbered taking them anywhere by myself. I have always sorta wanted to go to church as a family with my parents and my children so that we are all there together. So despite my desire to go to the Catholic church I was kind of cowed into going to the Baptist church with my parents so that I would have some help with my kids and so that it would be more of a ‘family’ church experience. I’m not really sure why I felt that was so important. But I did.
Now that the girls are a bit older it isn’t quite so daunting to take them places by myself. And I get absolutely nothing from going to my parents’ church about 98% of the time. Occasionally I get mildly offended by someone using church to preach about their political opinions. And every once in awhile I might get something from the message. But most of the time the service was more discouraging than uplifting and rarely did I leave church feeling better than when I went in.
In direct contrast, every time I have left Mass I have been excited to come back. I have felt uplifted and have felt like the message was exactly what I needed to hear. Even this past Sunday, when we were 10 minutes late and both girls were a bit fussy during the service, I enjoyed it. And I’m looking forward to going back this weekend.
Some people have had less than nice things to say about me going to a Catholic church. Which kinda bothers me but not enough to deter me from going. I don’t have an opinion on where other people go to church as long as they are getting something positive from it. I fully support religious freedom and a person’s right to choose where and how to practice their faith. I wish everyone would show the same respect for me and my family. So many people claim to support religious freedom but really what they support is everyone being free to believe the way they believe and go to the kind of church they go to. It really offends me! Some of my friends have been really supportive, even excited for me. Excited that my family may have a church that we can go to every week and enjoy and get something from. Supportive of our decision to go where we want to go, practice how we want to practice and believe what we want to believe. I really appreciate that.
The only thing I don’t really like is that to become “Catholic” or a member of a Catholic church you have to be confirmed first. As an adult you have to take a sort of class and become knowledgeable in the faith and kinda be tested. Children go through it as a normal part of their Sunday school classes and all.
Other than the religious news, I have also taken on a rather large personal task in the last week: I am relearning Spanish. I was mostly fluent when I was in college. I took two years of classes in high school and then two more years in college but after fulfilling the course requirement I pretty much stopped using it. As a result, I lost the language. At my job, I regularly need to be able to speak Spanish and it would be a handy skill to have out in the world. Also, studies have shown how much easier children can learn a second language in the first few years of life. And they have done studies showing how much more efficiently a bi-lingual person’s brain can work. I don’t know that my children will need Spanish in their adult life but I feel like knowing a second language would be beneficial. And they’re already learning some vocabulary from their Dora obsession. Evie has used Spanish words SEVERAL times without any prompting. Like saying “arriba” when she raises a car to the top of the ramp and then “abajo” when she releases it to go down the ramps. I’m thinking I will get back to a regular speaking level and start talking to them some in Spanish as well as letting them listen to the Spanish CDs with me. When they are old enough to start reading and using a computer, they can then use the PC software to learn to speak, read and write more Spanish so that hopefully by first grade they are reading and writing English and Spanish.
Still need to find a couple of Spanish speakers to help me keep it up once I get back to speaking fluently. But in the mean time I have been spending about 30-60 minutes every day working with Rosetta Stone. I have been doing some written assignments and listening to the audio companion that came with the software. I have only finished one unit so far. There are four units in the first level and there are five levels in total in the program. So I have quite a bit of work ahead of me. But I absolutely love Spanish (no really!) and so far, even though it has been time consuming, it has mostly been review for me. The hardest part will be picking back up all the vocabulary and remembering some of the weird verbs. But so far so good! And it feels good to be doing something other than just the same old routine every day. Who would have thought I’d like getting re-educated?
Hmm, what else…?
Still loving my minivan. Driving it is awesome. We made a family trip this past weekend for a birthday party and it went great. We let the girls watch Dora in the back while Josh and I listened to the radio up front. Babies fell asleep on the way home and we easily transitioned them from their car seats to their beds for a brief nap. Life with my two is much simpler with a minivan! Who would have thought?!?
Also got a new tattoo. My first foot/ankle piece. Absolutely love it but dreading having to go back to get it touched up. Because honestly it REALLY hurt. Haha. Pics to follow! Maybe I will even do a post on the whole meaning and reason behind the tattoo.
Hope everyone is doing well. I miss keeping up with you all but Easter will be here before you know it!
On the flip side it has been really nice to spend less time feeding the addiction that is Facebook. It has been a little weird to not know what’s going on, to ignore status updates and messages and pokes or not to be posting things like “Had an awesome day!” or “Elly just took her first steps!” I haven’t shared pictures of my new tattoo or uploaded any videos of Evie singing. Definitely just weird.
I gave up Facebook for Lent. And so far it has definitely been a challenge and a sacrifice. I considered several other things, like chocolate or wine, and while those would have certainly been missed they wouldn’t have been irreplaceable voids in my daily life. I’m kinda trying to regain some religious focus in my life and felt like giving up something really hard for Lent was a good place to start. My family hasn’t really been going to church recently, especially since some interpersonal drama has been going on at the church where I am technically a member. Not being on Facebook has reduced all the social media noise in my life.
So, what am I up to? What have I been doing since I gave up Facebook?
Well, this past Sunday the Dowd family went to Mass at the Catholic church in Mount Airy. I have enjoyed every time I have been there in the past. Since the first time I went back when I was preggo with little Evie I have felt something…a push, a desire, whatever…making me want to go back. My husband works late and isn’t usually able to accompany us to church and with the girls I am a bit outnumbered taking them anywhere by myself. I have always sorta wanted to go to church as a family with my parents and my children so that we are all there together. So despite my desire to go to the Catholic church I was kind of cowed into going to the Baptist church with my parents so that I would have some help with my kids and so that it would be more of a ‘family’ church experience. I’m not really sure why I felt that was so important. But I did.
Now that the girls are a bit older it isn’t quite so daunting to take them places by myself. And I get absolutely nothing from going to my parents’ church about 98% of the time. Occasionally I get mildly offended by someone using church to preach about their political opinions. And every once in awhile I might get something from the message. But most of the time the service was more discouraging than uplifting and rarely did I leave church feeling better than when I went in.
In direct contrast, every time I have left Mass I have been excited to come back. I have felt uplifted and have felt like the message was exactly what I needed to hear. Even this past Sunday, when we were 10 minutes late and both girls were a bit fussy during the service, I enjoyed it. And I’m looking forward to going back this weekend.
Some people have had less than nice things to say about me going to a Catholic church. Which kinda bothers me but not enough to deter me from going. I don’t have an opinion on where other people go to church as long as they are getting something positive from it. I fully support religious freedom and a person’s right to choose where and how to practice their faith. I wish everyone would show the same respect for me and my family. So many people claim to support religious freedom but really what they support is everyone being free to believe the way they believe and go to the kind of church they go to. It really offends me! Some of my friends have been really supportive, even excited for me. Excited that my family may have a church that we can go to every week and enjoy and get something from. Supportive of our decision to go where we want to go, practice how we want to practice and believe what we want to believe. I really appreciate that.
The only thing I don’t really like is that to become “Catholic” or a member of a Catholic church you have to be confirmed first. As an adult you have to take a sort of class and become knowledgeable in the faith and kinda be tested. Children go through it as a normal part of their Sunday school classes and all.
Other than the religious news, I have also taken on a rather large personal task in the last week: I am relearning Spanish. I was mostly fluent when I was in college. I took two years of classes in high school and then two more years in college but after fulfilling the course requirement I pretty much stopped using it. As a result, I lost the language. At my job, I regularly need to be able to speak Spanish and it would be a handy skill to have out in the world. Also, studies have shown how much easier children can learn a second language in the first few years of life. And they have done studies showing how much more efficiently a bi-lingual person’s brain can work. I don’t know that my children will need Spanish in their adult life but I feel like knowing a second language would be beneficial. And they’re already learning some vocabulary from their Dora obsession. Evie has used Spanish words SEVERAL times without any prompting. Like saying “arriba” when she raises a car to the top of the ramp and then “abajo” when she releases it to go down the ramps. I’m thinking I will get back to a regular speaking level and start talking to them some in Spanish as well as letting them listen to the Spanish CDs with me. When they are old enough to start reading and using a computer, they can then use the PC software to learn to speak, read and write more Spanish so that hopefully by first grade they are reading and writing English and Spanish.
Still need to find a couple of Spanish speakers to help me keep it up once I get back to speaking fluently. But in the mean time I have been spending about 30-60 minutes every day working with Rosetta Stone. I have been doing some written assignments and listening to the audio companion that came with the software. I have only finished one unit so far. There are four units in the first level and there are five levels in total in the program. So I have quite a bit of work ahead of me. But I absolutely love Spanish (no really!) and so far, even though it has been time consuming, it has mostly been review for me. The hardest part will be picking back up all the vocabulary and remembering some of the weird verbs. But so far so good! And it feels good to be doing something other than just the same old routine every day. Who would have thought I’d like getting re-educated?
Hmm, what else…?
Still loving my minivan. Driving it is awesome. We made a family trip this past weekend for a birthday party and it went great. We let the girls watch Dora in the back while Josh and I listened to the radio up front. Babies fell asleep on the way home and we easily transitioned them from their car seats to their beds for a brief nap. Life with my two is much simpler with a minivan! Who would have thought?!?
Also got a new tattoo. My first foot/ankle piece. Absolutely love it but dreading having to go back to get it touched up. Because honestly it REALLY hurt. Haha. Pics to follow! Maybe I will even do a post on the whole meaning and reason behind the tattoo.
Hope everyone is doing well. I miss keeping up with you all but Easter will be here before you know it!
Wednesday, February 22, 2012
Budgeting pressures
It is a lot of responsibility to be in charge of a family’s money. I’m the budgeter. The bill payer. The money person for our family. From talking to my friends, I think that every family probably has one to some degree or other. In many relationships, one person just steps up and takes the responsibility. Or maybe one person is better with money than the other. Or maybe they’re just the control freak. Or all three.
Either way, in our family, that person is me. And I have been since fairly early on in our relationship. I can tell you what our living expenses are each month, how much of that is just bill, what our gross debt is, how much is in savings, etc. I budget relentlessly, obsessively. I try to be prepared and to plan ahead. On big financial decisions, Josh and I discuss things, of course. But on the month to month stuff, he just likes to know it’s all been paid and kind of a rough determination of “this is going to be a tight month” or “we’re okay this month.” That sort of thing.
Recently, we have had some big financial changes and I’m feeling a bit of worry and fear as I face our first month of bill pay since things have changed. In the last month we paid off a credit card, traded in our old car and got a new car. As a result we have one bill that no longer exists, and two bills that will change. My car payment will be a bit more and go to a new place and my car insurance will be a bit higher. Plus, the new van has a MUCH larger gas tank and gets different gas mileage than the Versa. So I’m anxious to see how that plays out over the month’s expenses. Basically, I’m concerned to see how things go. I was careful and did the math and redid the math when Josh and I were discussing getting a minivan. I knew before we went to the dealership what we could afford and what we couldn’t. We’re within our budget of course, but I still fret.
Now I’m also looking to refinance my student loans, which could potentially save us a LOT of money. But again, the fear of the unknown just really gnaws at me. The federal government has approved a “Public Service Forgiveness Plan” where if you work in public service after 10 years of paying off your loans you are forgiven of all further debt. I have to refinance to be eligible which is a pain and there are several refinancing options to choose from. One of my refinance options would be to go with an income based plan and as my income stands now, I wouldn’t have to pay anything on my student loans. However, those bad boys would sit there and collect interest for each month I wasn’t paying on them. Ten years from now all that debt would be forgiven but still…the idea of my loans not being paid on for some unknown amount of time is a little scary.
It’s a lot of pressure to be financially responsible! To plan ahead with the future of little people in mind. A LOT of pressure. Trying to save so we can do annual family trips and vacations. Budgeting for things like gymnastics or swimming lessons. I want to establish savings accounts for each child so that they have a little bit of money to get started on later down the road. Meanwhile, looking a couple of years down the road and knowing that we really need a house with two bathrooms if we’re going to survive life with two girls. It’s a lot to keep up with.
But there is a certain degree of satisfaction at saving up and getting us something we need. Or surviving another fiscal year. We haven’t missed a payment yet or defaulted on any loans. I still have excellent credit and Josh’s credit is getting better. So maybe I’m doing alright. But still…I worry.
Either way, in our family, that person is me. And I have been since fairly early on in our relationship. I can tell you what our living expenses are each month, how much of that is just bill, what our gross debt is, how much is in savings, etc. I budget relentlessly, obsessively. I try to be prepared and to plan ahead. On big financial decisions, Josh and I discuss things, of course. But on the month to month stuff, he just likes to know it’s all been paid and kind of a rough determination of “this is going to be a tight month” or “we’re okay this month.” That sort of thing.
Recently, we have had some big financial changes and I’m feeling a bit of worry and fear as I face our first month of bill pay since things have changed. In the last month we paid off a credit card, traded in our old car and got a new car. As a result we have one bill that no longer exists, and two bills that will change. My car payment will be a bit more and go to a new place and my car insurance will be a bit higher. Plus, the new van has a MUCH larger gas tank and gets different gas mileage than the Versa. So I’m anxious to see how that plays out over the month’s expenses. Basically, I’m concerned to see how things go. I was careful and did the math and redid the math when Josh and I were discussing getting a minivan. I knew before we went to the dealership what we could afford and what we couldn’t. We’re within our budget of course, but I still fret.
Now I’m also looking to refinance my student loans, which could potentially save us a LOT of money. But again, the fear of the unknown just really gnaws at me. The federal government has approved a “Public Service Forgiveness Plan” where if you work in public service after 10 years of paying off your loans you are forgiven of all further debt. I have to refinance to be eligible which is a pain and there are several refinancing options to choose from. One of my refinance options would be to go with an income based plan and as my income stands now, I wouldn’t have to pay anything on my student loans. However, those bad boys would sit there and collect interest for each month I wasn’t paying on them. Ten years from now all that debt would be forgiven but still…the idea of my loans not being paid on for some unknown amount of time is a little scary.
It’s a lot of pressure to be financially responsible! To plan ahead with the future of little people in mind. A LOT of pressure. Trying to save so we can do annual family trips and vacations. Budgeting for things like gymnastics or swimming lessons. I want to establish savings accounts for each child so that they have a little bit of money to get started on later down the road. Meanwhile, looking a couple of years down the road and knowing that we really need a house with two bathrooms if we’re going to survive life with two girls. It’s a lot to keep up with.
But there is a certain degree of satisfaction at saving up and getting us something we need. Or surviving another fiscal year. We haven’t missed a payment yet or defaulted on any loans. I still have excellent credit and Josh’s credit is getting better. So maybe I’m doing alright. But still…I worry.
Adjusting
So, I am excited to own a minivan. It’s true. I love it. I love driving it and have had a great time showing off my automatic doors and trunk. I think it’s a great looking vehicle and I’m really happy with my selection. But simultaneously, I’m sorta having a weird time adjusting. I don’t know what it is exactly. I think it is just an adjustment. Because no part of my identity isn’t “mom” now. Ya know?
My vehicle is nice to drive and it’s aesthetically pleasing. But my vehicle is no longer made to be fun to drive. It’s made for transporting, both people and items. It’s not a sports car or a sedan. It’s a minivan. It’s definitely a mom car, albeit a nice mom car. And it’s the first time I’ve had a strictly mom type vehicle.
So it is an adjustment.
My very first car was a Nissan 240 SX. It was a 1989 model with more miles than you can probably put on a car nowadays. It was a five-speed, manual transmission, and would absolutely fly. Not necessarily the safest car for a 16 year-old. But definitely fit me. A couple of years later I traded that and got a Ford Probe GT Turbo. Another manual transmission but this one was at least front wheel drive. It was another fun little car. After the Probe I got a 1998 Jeep Grand Cherokee Laredo. I lived in Boone then and needed something with four wheel drive. But when we moved back off the mountain in 2007, I traded the Jeep for a 2001 Ford Escort. In 2009, when I was pregnant with Evie, I needed something four door so I traded the Escort in on a 2007 Nissan Versa. And three years later, I find myself with a child on each hip looking a minivan. It has been an adjustment.
In the decade that I have been driving, I have had a pretty diverse range of vehicles. I’m hoping I can get over this new vehicle every two years thing. I’m hoping that I have found a vehicle which will fit my life needs for many years, not just a couple. I’m hoping that just because I drive a mom car that doesn’t mean that I’m less attractive or less fun or less cool. I’m hoping that it means that I’m practical and reasonable. Planning ahead. Prepared. Dedicated to being a parent.
But it has been an adjustment.
But I am really looking forward to our first road trip. Hoping to find some time go see my grandparents soon. And then need to plan a trip to Boone to visit my in-laws, hopefully next month. In April, we are planning to go to a petting zoo in Virginia and now I’m even more excited about that. It’s going to be their grand opening. (By the way, you can check them out on Facebook, the name is Garden of Eden, located in Martinsville, Va.) And I won four free tickets! Anyone interested on going with me? It’s going to be awesome. Then in April or May I’m hoping/planning to take the girls back to the zoo in Asheboro. This year, my parents could even come along since there is room in our car! Sometime this summer I want to take the girls to the children’s museum in Winston and the historic farm in Pinnacle, Horne Creek Farm.
Now that it is so easy to get my kids in and out, I’m already scheduling a lot more outings. No more being trapped in the house because it is such a pain to try to go anywhere. Nope. We are going to go to the regional museum in Mount Airy. And going to try out all the local parks. We’re going to visit the Mount Airy Library one week and the Dobson library another. We’ll go to Pilot Mountain State Park one Saturday when it’s nice and walk around some and maybe go up one of the trails.
See, an adjustment.
In my previous car, it was such a pain to try to go anywhere. Wrestling both children in and out was so exhausting. But the whole process is so much easier with the van. It’s also easier since the kids are bigger. Evie can get herself into her car seat and actually buckle herself in while I’m getting Elly in. But the van facilitates even that aspect. Carrying Elly and holding Evie’s hand, I can press a button on my key fob (aka the remote thingy) and Evie’s door will begin sliding open. I can help Evie up into her seat, press the button on the van to start the door closing, walk around the van and open the other door. Put Elly into her car seat while Evie is getting her buckles on. Climb in to check Evie’s buckles, recheck Elly’s, climb out and shut the door and get in the front seat. *relieved sigh* Takes probably HALF the time it used to take. Maybe even less. I had to get Elly into her seat while fighting to keep Evie inside the door so she didn’t run off in the parking lot or into traffic, then take Evie around her side, by which time she was usually aggravated and hateful from all my cajoling and fussing while I tried to get Elly in. Now it’s just so easy! I guess if you haven’t done it you probably won’t appreciate the difference. But I assure you that things are WAY simpler with a van.
So yeah, an adjustment. I am truly happy with my life as a minivan mom. I hope that this doesn’t mean I will never get checked out by a random dude again, cause that was always good for the old self-esteem. But either way, life in a minivan is good. And hey, it comes with a built in DVD player! And my very own remote.
My vehicle is nice to drive and it’s aesthetically pleasing. But my vehicle is no longer made to be fun to drive. It’s made for transporting, both people and items. It’s not a sports car or a sedan. It’s a minivan. It’s definitely a mom car, albeit a nice mom car. And it’s the first time I’ve had a strictly mom type vehicle.
So it is an adjustment.
My very first car was a Nissan 240 SX. It was a 1989 model with more miles than you can probably put on a car nowadays. It was a five-speed, manual transmission, and would absolutely fly. Not necessarily the safest car for a 16 year-old. But definitely fit me. A couple of years later I traded that and got a Ford Probe GT Turbo. Another manual transmission but this one was at least front wheel drive. It was another fun little car. After the Probe I got a 1998 Jeep Grand Cherokee Laredo. I lived in Boone then and needed something with four wheel drive. But when we moved back off the mountain in 2007, I traded the Jeep for a 2001 Ford Escort. In 2009, when I was pregnant with Evie, I needed something four door so I traded the Escort in on a 2007 Nissan Versa. And three years later, I find myself with a child on each hip looking a minivan. It has been an adjustment.
In the decade that I have been driving, I have had a pretty diverse range of vehicles. I’m hoping I can get over this new vehicle every two years thing. I’m hoping that I have found a vehicle which will fit my life needs for many years, not just a couple. I’m hoping that just because I drive a mom car that doesn’t mean that I’m less attractive or less fun or less cool. I’m hoping that it means that I’m practical and reasonable. Planning ahead. Prepared. Dedicated to being a parent.
But it has been an adjustment.
But I am really looking forward to our first road trip. Hoping to find some time go see my grandparents soon. And then need to plan a trip to Boone to visit my in-laws, hopefully next month. In April, we are planning to go to a petting zoo in Virginia and now I’m even more excited about that. It’s going to be their grand opening. (By the way, you can check them out on Facebook, the name is Garden of Eden, located in Martinsville, Va.) And I won four free tickets! Anyone interested on going with me? It’s going to be awesome. Then in April or May I’m hoping/planning to take the girls back to the zoo in Asheboro. This year, my parents could even come along since there is room in our car! Sometime this summer I want to take the girls to the children’s museum in Winston and the historic farm in Pinnacle, Horne Creek Farm.
Now that it is so easy to get my kids in and out, I’m already scheduling a lot more outings. No more being trapped in the house because it is such a pain to try to go anywhere. Nope. We are going to go to the regional museum in Mount Airy. And going to try out all the local parks. We’re going to visit the Mount Airy Library one week and the Dobson library another. We’ll go to Pilot Mountain State Park one Saturday when it’s nice and walk around some and maybe go up one of the trails.
See, an adjustment.
In my previous car, it was such a pain to try to go anywhere. Wrestling both children in and out was so exhausting. But the whole process is so much easier with the van. It’s also easier since the kids are bigger. Evie can get herself into her car seat and actually buckle herself in while I’m getting Elly in. But the van facilitates even that aspect. Carrying Elly and holding Evie’s hand, I can press a button on my key fob (aka the remote thingy) and Evie’s door will begin sliding open. I can help Evie up into her seat, press the button on the van to start the door closing, walk around the van and open the other door. Put Elly into her car seat while Evie is getting her buckles on. Climb in to check Evie’s buckles, recheck Elly’s, climb out and shut the door and get in the front seat. *relieved sigh* Takes probably HALF the time it used to take. Maybe even less. I had to get Elly into her seat while fighting to keep Evie inside the door so she didn’t run off in the parking lot or into traffic, then take Evie around her side, by which time she was usually aggravated and hateful from all my cajoling and fussing while I tried to get Elly in. Now it’s just so easy! I guess if you haven’t done it you probably won’t appreciate the difference. But I assure you that things are WAY simpler with a van.
So yeah, an adjustment. I am truly happy with my life as a minivan mom. I hope that this doesn’t mean I will never get checked out by a random dude again, cause that was always good for the old self-esteem. But either way, life in a minivan is good. And hey, it comes with a built in DVD player! And my very own remote.
Tuesday, February 21, 2012
First snow!
Well the girls finally got to play in the snow! Elly's first snow and she loved it. Evie had overheard me and Josh discussing the possibility of snow and when I put her to bed Saturday night she asked me if the snow would come see her. All Sunday morning she looked out the window and watched for the snow. When I put her down for nap she still hadn't seen a flake. But during her nap about an inch or more of snow accumulated.
When she woke from her nap I told her that there was snow and she didn't believe me. Her face when she came around the corner and saw the snow was absolutely priceless. Evie was dumb founded!
It was a battle to get her to eat a little snack and put on some warm clothes before she went tearing outside.
Bundled and psyched we went outside. Elly was pretty impressed. All the cold wet fluffy was neat. She planted her face in it and patted it and stomped it.
Evie stomped around and yammered about how amazing it was and how her foot prints looked. She was having so much fun I let her stay and stomp in te yard while I got the girls a bath ready. It was an awesome time!
My favorite part of the snow might have been that it was mostly gone by noon the next day. Haha. Though I wish we had gotten more play time. It was beautiful and lots o fun.
When she woke from her nap I told her that there was snow and she didn't believe me. Her face when she came around the corner and saw the snow was absolutely priceless. Evie was dumb founded!
It was a battle to get her to eat a little snack and put on some warm clothes before she went tearing outside.
Bundled and psyched we went outside. Elly was pretty impressed. All the cold wet fluffy was neat. She planted her face in it and patted it and stomped it.
Evie stomped around and yammered about how amazing it was and how her foot prints looked. She was having so much fun I let her stay and stomp in te yard while I got the girls a bath ready. It was an awesome time!
My favorite part of the snow might have been that it was mostly gone by noon the next day. Haha. Though I wish we had gotten more play time. It was beautiful and lots o fun.
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