In Another Life...

So, do you think there is one single person out there for each of us?

No really. Think about it.

Katie Perry's recent hit, "In Another Life" made me really think about it the other night on the way home. And I just wondered if anyone really believed in fate and destiny any more? In this day and age it just seems difficult to believe.

Like any little girl I grew up wanting to believe in fairy tales and Prince Charming. Then of course I grew up a bit and entered the dating world and quickly came to realize that the only way I would meet Prince Charming was at Disney World.

But if you do believe there is one person out there for each of us, how does it work? What a lot of stress and pressure looking for that one, single, solitary person. I just don't believe it. I don't know, for me it's just too much to try to buy into.

Not that I don't think that there are people each of us can be happy with.

And I totally believe that marriage can be forever. I think it is incredibly difficult, but possible. Just because of how much people change over the years. I think back to guys I dated 10 years ago, who I of course thought I was going to be with FOREVER (note the eye roll), and I think how preposterous it was. How much different I am now. How completely naive and unrealistic such expectations were for a 16 year old.

One of the things that makes it the hardest for me to buy into the whole destiny, one person for each of us, is my mom. She is quite happily married now. To a really great guy who I hope she's going to be happy with for a long time. And I think that this is probably who she's supposed to be with. But I don't think she could have been with him 30 years ago. And if she had of some how managed to meet him 30 years ago (when their age difference would have made a difference since he's a few years her junior and they lived in completely different states) then my brother and I wouldn't be here. Or we certainly would look different. My step dad has blonde hair and blue eyes and I got my dark hair and eyes from my biological dad. I may have complained about my non-generic look a decade ago, but these days I love it.

I find it hard to believe that my mom shouldn't have been with my dad. Ya know, since that would sorta void me out. But I also don't believe she should have stayed with him and worked out their issues. Although he had a promising outlook when they got married, some how or other he lost all his motivation and has STILL not made anything of himself. He STILL doesn't have anything to show for his half a century of living. Other than two kids who he never sees or talks to. And two granddaughters, one of which he's never even met. But I don't really feel like he can take much credit for any of us.

I believe that for each of us, there are several someones out there that we can be happy with. Each of us walks a path from day one to day 32,850. We make choices, left or right. The blue shirt or the red shirt. Four year university or local college. Super size my value meal? Take the stairs? Go for the bigger tv? That's what living is all about. So how can you think that with the billions of choices you make every day that the path is some how preplanned and ordained and you're going to meet Mr. Right at some point and end up married happily ever after?

Too many people get divorced for the RIGHT reasons and too many people get married for the WRONG reasons for me to swallow such a logic. It doesn't mean I don't believe it God (I do) or that I'm not a Christian (I am) or that I don't think my husband and I will be together for 30 years (I will be 51! Wow!). I am quite happy.

So, all of this train of thought from a Katie Perry song. Go figure. Driving home from Boone in the dark listening to the radio can apparently bring to mind all sorts of weird things.