To day care or not to day care...

Like probably every other parent in the world, I think my kid is brilliant, talented, and oh so special. And of course, she is. Aren't all kids?

Evie has always been ahead with a lot of her milestones. She held her head up early. Slept through the night at a couple of weeks old. Started eating solids at four months. Started pulling up and cruising at 6 months. She began walking at 10 months old. Started imaginary play at 14 months, etc. Typically she was ahead of when the baby books said she would start doing things. However, with her language she hasn't been ahead. And starting at her 12 month check-up she was even a little behind. My doctor reassured me that she had probably been focused on learning her physical milestones and she would catch up. But she didn't. With my bachelor's degree in English with a minor in Communications I was convinced that she would just start talking in sentences one day. That maybe she would just skip the whole baby talk thing. Other parents' babies were saying "mama" and "dada" and "baba" while Evie would simply point at what she wanted until we figured it out. She laughed and made non-sense gibberish talk. But as far as actual words, she wasn't interested. 

Now at almost 17 months Evie has approximately 20 words that she can say. I know because I've heard her, with my own ears, say them. She can say baby, book, ball, bye, juice, milk, Momma, Daddy, did it, done, etc. She's even used two-word sentences like "Daddy book." If you ask Evie to say a word she usually ignores you. Occasionally  she will repeat something for you. But those occasions are few and far between. Typically when she wants something she points and grunts or cries. I've tried withholding something to attempt to force her to use words, while repeating the word I'm trying to get her to say. This tends to push her from "kinda whiny" to "super angry" and causes a full-blown tantrum to boot.

At her 15-month check-up, Evie's pediatrician said that if she didn't catch up on her language by her 18-month check-up that we would need to get her started with a speech therapist or an early intervention group. Greeeeaaat. So needless to say as the 18-month-mark approaches, I feel more and more pushed to make her talk. Especially since I feel its more a decision by her to NOT talk rather than something that is "wrong" with her. I think there is kind of a stigma with getting a therapist or early intervention involved and I really don't want to get that started when I don't really feel like its necessary. I just don't know how to explain to my toddler that she HAS to start talking. Otherwise not starting some sort of intervention will make me look (and feel) like a negligent parent. And who wants to be one of those?

One of the things that I have been told over and over again by other parents is "Put her in daycare, that made my kid start talking." Josh and I discussed it, decided to wait. Discussed it again, decided we couldn't afford it. Discussed it some more and decided that we would work to find a way to afford it if it would help Evie. So we came up with an amount we could probably afford and started calling area day cares. I also regularly posted on Facebook to get suggestions from friends. (I firmly believe other parents are your absolute best resource on everything kid related and what better way to access them than my favorite social networking site? ha)

One woman was suggested as a great option. She keeps a few kids in her home and while she didn't have an opening she would be happy to work with us and let Evie come on the days that one of the other children was out. Her hours started nice and early and she was located a reasonable distance from my home. Even better, her rate was right at what we said we could spend. Everything seems to check out so we've got all the paper work filled out and I'm going to take Evie by one morning next week to let her play and see how she does. Then hopefully she can start going once a week or so and it will all work out.

I definitely want to get it started and make it a kind of regular thing before #2 arrives. I don't want Evie to feel like she's being shipped off because there's a new baby. And I hope that having a couple of hours with just one baby to take care of might help make life less stressful for all of us. Plus it will give me some one-on-one time with the new addition. Then I'll just have to come up with a way for one-on-one time with Evie and we'll be good there! Maybe the baby will sleep a lot?? hah! Yeah...right.

I really hope Evie makes friends quickly and makes rapid progress with her talking. I think as soon as she gets away from those of us who know that a series of grunts and an imperial gesture means that she wants juice, she'll be forced to talk. Plus she'll get to see other kids talking. Maybe that will influence her. Peer pressure at an early age. Maybe having an outlet, something that she gets to do without her sister, will help make the transition from only child to older child easier as well.

As I write this I realize there are a lot of "I hope's" and "maybe's" which isn't very inspiring. The hardest thing about this is that my baby girl has never stayed with anyone other than grandparents. And its scary to think about leaving her with someone else. Its also sad to think that it will be that much less time that I get to spend with her one day a week. And this will be one more experience outside the home...one step closer to preschool and the Pre-K. She's growing up too quickly!

I'm anxious to get it started to see how it goes...